This is for all....especially parents and teachers...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...I generally click lots of pics of Nature and post them to all my contacts. Why i do this?...Because 'We are created by Nature, we are part of the Nature, the whole universe...and we are supposed to live WITH-IT...But whereas gradually we are moving away from it with all man-made beliefs, negative social structures/issues, making us sick all the time...When we live against nature we are sure to get stressed and strained in body, mind and relationships!!...When we live with nature, as advocated by the Vedhas, we are sure to be healthy, peaceful and happy at all places and in all dimensions. So, to motivate everyone i click pics of the other elements of Nature and send to all.

Another reason is, we all force our children to excel in academics, want them to become employable etc. Sadly all the subjects we read anywhere is all about Nature...1. Physics is all about physical properties of matter in the Nature...2. Chemistry is all about chemical properties of matter in the Nature...3. Biology and related subjects are all about the living organisms...4. Geography is all about this earth which teaches and shows us the Nature around...5. History is all about the world, how we reached where we are, the past of this world, how to go about in future etc....6. Languages teach us the culture and are tools of communication...the science of communication...7. Mathematics is all about the Variables and Constants in the Nature, their dependencies and independence, the methods of finding the value of the unknown variable...!!

So, all the subjects we learn are related to our surroundings...the Nature around us. Therefore, when we love Nature, when we lose ourselves in the Nature, when we involve ourselves in observing and analysing nature, when we are interested to know about Nature, when we live with the Nature, we are sure to gain interest in studies, do well in studies, get good marks, get good jobs, learn many valuable lessons of life and living from all living organisms around us and live a peacefully, happy and healthy life!!

Remaining detached from Nature gives us diseases of the body and mind leading to spoiled relationships too. Doing well in studies, while remaining detached from Nature, just for the sake of getting good marks or good job etc is also stressful...they will always miss something...the peace... in their inner self and finally get surrendered to spiritual gurus and their organisations where they will teach them as to how to remain connected with Nature to live peacefully.

Therefore, let us always be with Nature, teach our children also how to live with Nature, how to get attached with nature, how to study the nature etc...and live naturally and not artificially!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY FOR PARENTS AND TEACHERS...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY FOR PARENTS AND TEACHERS...

Nature drives all human beings born on this earth towards self-actualisation from their inner self. That is, to realise their full potential, skills, talents, abilities, grow in them, become authorities in these, get appreciation and reach the state of self-actualisation!!...This is unavoidable...It is the very purpose of life!!...For all human beings!!

But sadly our 'present' culture, our parents do not know this. The marriage oriented and animal culture of ours truncate this process. They don't self actualise. They don't allow their children to self-actualise, they don't allow them to grow to their peak potentials...All these people get affected in their mind from deep within. Learned helplessness state is a state of mental illness. They will appear to be happy and peaceful on the surface but subconsciously they are living against the Nature, the natural process of development...So, their body, mind and social relationships will be stressed and strained. If they are highly intelligent then they are sure to development mental disorders and spoil the life of theirs and that of others!!...All others will also slowly and gradually land up in mild or serious mental and social issues. They will also get ailments, less immunity and related diseases and suffer.

So, let us allow ourselves and others to self actualise. Let us not stop or truncate this natural process. Educate the elders at home on this issue.

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL WHO ARE INTO RELATIONSHIPS...COMMITTED OR UNMARRIED...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL WHO ARE INTO RELATIONSHIPS...COMMITTED OR UNMARRIED...

Animals get attached to their masters or place who/which give them food, shelter and a breeding place and environment. When they stop getting these or any of these, then they leave the master or the place and go to a new master or new place where they get their basic needs. They don't hate their old master because they don't think/analyse and do not have a mind. They are also not possessive and jealous. They don't have ego. They don't remember the past or forget the past if they get positives again. So, they don't get affected. In fact, they go back to him/or the place if they get what they need. If they stop getting again then they again leave. They are soo simple, simply live their life, because they have a very simple brain!!

Human beings are also like these animals. They go to people and places where they get their needs, wants and expectations met. They leave the people physically or mentally or socially when they stop getting what they want. But the issue is human beings get affected very badly when they leave or when the other person leaves the relationship. They develop hate if they don't get what they want. They also become possessive. They are egoistic. They remember the unpleasantness of the past. Generally they go back or don't go back when they again get what they want. Again they leave the person when their needs and expectations are not met!!

To overcome these negatives, to be not like animals...to be like human beings...to be good to all...to be unconditional...only we have been blessed with SIXTH SENSE of 'thinking'...to remain positive with all, everyone, every place, always...to overcome the hate...to overcome the possessiveness...to overcome the complicacies of the complex brain...and the complex mind formed out of it...!!

Whereas we don't understand this, live like animals...fight with people...use all kind of hate words...break-up with the relationships...and mess up the only chance we have got to enjoy this life...enjoy this world...enjoy this earth!!

Therefore, let us wake up, live like human beings, not like animals, use the sixth sense to overcome the negatives of natural possessiveness and hate, and learn to be independent while being dependent, make life long healthy relationships by teaching the other person and avoid break-ups which affect the development of children at home and our own peace, happiness and good physical, mental and social well-being!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS...Sir, today everyone has thousands of contacts and friendships. It is so easy to make contacts, friendships and relationships!!.

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS...

One student:

Sir, today everyone has thousands of contacts and friendships. It is so easy to make contacts, friendships and relationships!!....But every one leaves after some time!...Almost every one suffers break-up!!...Some are less affected and some are affected more!!...that is all the difference....No relationship stays for long!!...How to believe anyone?...I am scared about my future sir!!....How to get a life long relationship?...How to find real love?...How to find a life mate?

Ans: Knowledge about Relationship Management is the need of the hour!!

Everyone goes to the other person only to satisfy their needs, wants and expectations which can never be met all the time and to their satisfaction!!

As relationships are easy, people generally leave one relationship that is not giving satiation and hop to the other and hopping goes on and on!!

Everyone might have thousands of contacts and few hundred friendships and few tens of relationships all the time which may be changing from time to time. But no one probably will have THAT ONE RELATIONSHIP....

.....WITH WHOM THEY HAVE THE TOTAL TRUST AND CAN SURRENDER TO THAT PERSON WITH CONFIDENCE!!

......WITH WHOM THEY CAN SOCIALISE WITHOUT FEAR OR HESITATION OR UNEASYNESS!!

......WITH WHOM THEY HAVE THE COMFORT TO SHARE AND DISCUSS ANYTHING UNDER THE SKY!!

......WITH WHOM THEY CAN STRIKE A RELATIONSHIP THAT THEY STRIKE WITH GODS!!

.....WITH WHOM THEY FEEL THEY ARE HAPPY, PEACEFUL, PHYSICALLY MENTALLY AND SOCIALLY HEALTHY, GROWING, DEVELOPING, MATURING, EVOLVING AND ABLE TO REALISE THEIR PASSIONS, GOALS, DREAMS!!

.....WITH WHOM THEY FEEL THEY DON'T HAVE ANY CONFUSIONS IN LIFE...THEY ARE CLEAR IN THEIR CONSCIENCE AND ARE ABLE TO TAKE DECISIONS THAT DOES NOT DISTURB THEIR PEACE, HAPPINESS AND HEALTH!!

....WITH WHOM THEY FEEL THEY ARE ABLE TO FACE ANY CHALLENGE ON THIS EARTH WITH EASE, COMFORT AND CONFIDENCE!!

....WITH WHOM THEY ARE ABLE TO SELF-ACTUALISE!!

Just be that ONE PERSON IN SOMEBODY'S LIFE!!...and see how things change in your life!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY THOSE IN RELATIONSHIPS....WHETHER MARRIED OR UNMARRIED...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY THOSE IN RELATIONSHIPS....WHETHER MARRIED OR UNMARRIED...

A Relationship is always under the control of the one who has the least needs, wants and expectations!!

So, keep the control of the relationship in your hands!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

Results of anger are more painful than the reasons of anger!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

1. Here many are not developed properly to become eligible for husband or wife or parents. Some of them become educated, trained, learned and eligible when they become grandparents!!

2. Results of anger are more painful than the reasons of anger!!

Peacefuly yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

"Enough is enough!! I am going to divorce my wife!!"

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL MARRIED COUPLE...

One interesting person approached and said he is going to break his 17 years of marriage life after some time. But he wanted an immediate solution for his peaceful living at home!!

Both husband and wife are working and earning well. But they have not been talking for quite some time and sleeping separately. Cold war. Lack of Communication. He does not do anything at home and does not involve in the education of the children. They have a son and a daughter more than 10 years old.

When asked for reasons for marital discord he quoted some reasons which appeared silly to me but major ones to him, which is the usual case!!

Lots of suggestions were given but they did not seem to be acceptable to him. The major complaint was that her wife is asking him to do some common chores and his own responsibilities at home which are not acceptable to him. He said he has never done them before and after marriage, she has never complained, but now after 17 years she is complaining, insisting and shouting at home!! He also complained that his jobs are not done by anyone. He hates the washed clothes drying indoors in the line for days!!

We can make out that his ego was not allowing him to do them. He also repeatedly said he loves his children very much and he is just waiting for them to get married and settled. He also said that he has conveyed this decision of divorce to his wife.

Then i told him, "Yes sir, you are right!!...You have the right to live peacefully. You must seek divorce at once your children become adults and independent. It will not be possible to live with her anymore. Please do that!!"

His face indicated that he felt better (that i agreed with him)!

I added "But you should start preparing to live independently on your own without depending on others for anything. Do you agree with this?"...He nodded, but there was a bit of hesitation. He did not agree 100%.

"Tomorrow onwards you pick up your clothes, fold and keep them in alimirah sir!!...Let us start with this!"...He agreed. Next day he called up and said he did that. After two days i said 'You love your daughter and she has 10th board exam. So, why don't you pick up her clothes too and support her!". He did that!!...His daughter felt nice and she gave nice hugs and kisses to him, thanking for his care!!...He said he felt nice about it. After two days i said 'You love your son a lot. He is preparing for JEE and busy. Why don't you pick up his dresses too!. His son too thanked the daddy with hugs and kisses. Daddy reported nice feeling though he felt he is not comfortable somewhere!!

Then i told him "Without your wife you would not have got this family and home. During early years of marriage when children were not there, she did everything. Now she has to do all house chores, prepare everyone in the morning to school and office, cook, after coming back home late in the evening again she has to do all the chores and focus on children education too. When she is physically tired and mentally drained, how can she be romantic with you on bed?...So, as a kind gesture or on humanitarian grounds or as a social service that has to begin from home, why don't pick up your wife's clothes too!'. He did not agree. I left it there. But he reported next day that after picking up the clothes of three, when he saw the clothes of his wife alone there, he felt something inside that it is not good. So, he picked up her clothes too!!

When mother returned the children told her that dad picked up all clothes. She felt happy,cared and loved. She felt her husband showed some responsible behaviour to support her in family chores. After two days he reported that all is well and they are sleeping together. I suggested that if he cooperates more then the happiness index not only of himself but also that of the family will increase. Yesterday he reported a total change in his famly with more fun and successes.

1. This may not work out for all because every case is different. But all cases are solvable and breaking of families and relationships, negative effect on development of children can be avoided.
2. He loved his wife. That is why he was not peaceful and came for help. Ego, lack of communication, cold war built up over years was the issue.
3. Everyone including children should be made responsible for their own chores. Temporary support can be extended by others during stressful and demanding times. Common jobs should be shared.
4. It is better to off-load in families where everyone is aspiring in their studies / career.
5. Such tiresome, monotonous and robotic activities are to be done for improving socialisation, fun, love, care and share and not as work and burden with blames.

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!