Qn.
“Sir I am a girl of thirty plus. An IIT and IIM product. Worked and working for
an MNC. Unmarried. Why I am not able to live a normal family life like any
other average girl?...Why I am suffering like this inspite of being intelligent,
smart and good at everything?”
Ans: The answers are like this….
1. To
live a family life like any other average girl in our society you don’t need
high intelligence. You just need average intelligence with the basic natural
instincts like any other average girl or living organism.
2. You
have a body which is similar to that of an average girl which wants a reproductive,
rearing based family life and that is what is driving your brain, when the
hormonal secretions are overpowering or dominating, to create thoughts, emotions
and behaviours, with wants, needs and expectations to live a normal, average,
family life. During these times you will get convinced that living a normal
family is what is success in life, contentment in life, fulfilment in life,
satisfaction in life. You will feel that all thoughts, decisions, convictions revolving
around this kind of family centric life is correct, true etc and career centric
life is wrong, false.
3. When
your body is not dominating, when it is calm, cool etc the mind is free,
dominant and acting as per the intelligence and it’s thirst and hunger, as per
its urges and cravings, as per it’s want and needs, as per its dreams, passion,
goals, aims, destiny, as per the dominant personality factors…at this time the
mind is thinking about achievements, power, authority, being in the lime-light,
appreciation, becoming global icon, identity and image, adventure, travel, meeting
people of different cultures, experiencing different kinds of life people live
at different places, etc. At this time
your mind says this is right, correct and this is what will give you sense of
contentment, fulfilment, achievement, success, meaning of life etc…This is
because of the high IQ and the Type A personality traits.
4. So,
you are being pulled in both directions…you are stressed…you are confused…you
are not knowing what is right and correct. In general parents of our society
are family centric…only family centric…as our society is behind money, wealth,
marriage, family, social status through these…our parents send children to colleges
to become capable of money and wealth makers…to increase their value in the matrimonial
market….these parents obviously do not know what the high IQ does inside the
brain, and they will brain wash you supporting your body….the society around
consisting of relatives, friends etc also belong to such families and so will
talk like the parents only. But your IQ and personality traits only remain on
your side making you different from others and telling you to be yourself and
unique. Some give up this fight, sacrifice their dreams, and finally accept someone
as their life partner, as per their parents’ wish making compromises and
sacrifices, marry, and make adjustments and live. Some marriages are
successful, some appear to be successful externally, and some are failures.
5. Some
people leave both the career and family life and join ashrams and spiritual communities.
Now, the
solution, the answer…as to what is right?
Taking only one
life, that is only family life, or only career life, or only spiritual life is
wrong. We have a body with various functional systems and if they don’t do
their task then we land up with diseases of those systems or organs. So,
allowing the body to live the reproductive family life for which it has been designed,
evolved, and created is unavoidable. You have a high IQ which has created a
purpose, meaning to life, to be different, with a clear destiny to serve the
humanity at a higher dimension of questioning the nature and finding solutions
at humanity and global level and find solutions to problems. Therefore, self-actualisation
at higher IQ level can not be kept away to keep the mind without disorders.
Understanding the life as a whole in the right way that gives a good physical,
mental and social wellbeing, lots of peace, no stress, pitching the life goals
at humanity and global perspectives and this is what is all about a spiritual living
and not living away from finding scientific solutions of population explosion,
depleting resources, increasing diseases and disorders, resultant problems in
administration and management of organisations, societies, states and countries
etc. If high IQ people remain away from this who else will find methodical solutions
for humanity?
Therefore, wait to
find a proper match for your personality traits, dreams, the part of career
which affects your daily living and life etc and get married. Modify your day
to day living in family life to suit your career goals and understand the whole
life in a way that is not stressful and live a peaceful, happy, healthy,
successful, contented, fulfilled, and self-actualized life.
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