hai all...IMPORTANT FOR PARENTS, BOYS AND GIRLS...
hai all...do you agree that SELF CONFIDENCE is the most important thing required to live on this earth?
the basic of life to be alive is ability to get food, water, air, protective clothes, shelter and ability to protect from threats (recently sex also got added...i.e reproductive need...procreation (not recreation!!)). One should be able to get all these by own self. One should not depend on others for any of these. If this ability is there, then SELF CONFIDENCE WILL EXIST. Otherwise the individual WILL NOT HAVE SELF CONFIDENCE. This can take any turn from living a slavery life to committing suicide.
Self confidence emanates and increases in us as we grow...develop...through gaining of:-
1. knowledge
2. life skills
3. professional skills
4. experience in life and profession
In the past, girls were not given this by our culture and society. They were only taught house hold chores. They were not given education to seek a decent employment.They were made dependent on husband, mother, father, brothers, in-laws (father in law, mother in law, brother in law, sister in law...and all such laws), relatives etc. It was convenient to the men as they felt she can not run away or has no scope for any act to go against the system or away from the family. Even the social justice or customs and traditions of the society was keeping the women submissive. So, they lacked self confidence.
They had only their body and knowledge, skills related to house chores only as the asset to get the basic needs fulfilled. They only had professional skills related to making of things of use at home. Their life skills were related to managing the behaviours of all at home in a combined family system.
As she lacked self confidence she was all the time having fear in the mind. She perceived every one and every thing as threat. Parents and brothers were threats. Though she had confidence in them (as there was no otherway for survival and dependence), she also had a fear of 'hope they don't ditch me!'...'they don't show partiality!' etc...
this continued with husband...being suspicious...checking everything...other day one of my friend's wife told me 'i know each minute where he is what he doing and whom he is talking to!'...what does this show?...poor lady was feeling proud of this!!!...
so, they were always parasites, scared each second, perceiving threats from every one, every thing, every life situation from all directions and in all dimensions...this is what is depicted in TV serials...so, they can never breath freedom, can never have happiness, peace, harmony, good social relationships, feel like committing suicide or running away...
total dependence and total parasitic living leads to destructive possessiveness...because the organism does not want to leave the person or place or life situation that is giving feeling of comfort for it...so it wants to possess that...in such an environment the person will have very low self confidence, low self esteem, will not be able to do any job properly...mind and body will always be stressed to the chore and higher limits...they are always slaves, feel caged, trapped, no escape...they live in 'learned helplessness'…they had to accept that ‘this is the way life goes on here!’…the other ladies also counselled them to accept things as they are and change as per the demands of others around quoting their own lives.
then how they lived???....how they felt happiness???...because they physically got the basic needs like food, clothing, shelter, air and sex (though for few seconds or minutes and the poor ladies perceived the ‘approaches’ or ‘attractions’ or ‘warming up’ behaviours as love!!!).
Their biggest strength for psychological or emotional support were their kids!!!...they showed love to them in abundance and got back also from the kids. So, their psychological needs got met to an extent. Animals, gardens or fields were there at home to which they got attached so much that their unconditional love needs got met. So, though there were tortures, uncertainties, fear of unknown, they could live or survive because of nature, animals and kids.
So, the crux is
1. Self confidence is the most important thing required for a girl..i.e ability to earn all the basic needs, life comforts and live a life of dignity, freedom and equivalence without differentiation and discrimination.
2. The society is changing and it is beyond anybody’s control. So, there is no other way other than to change our culture, life styles, beliefs, customs and traditions.
3. We can not live or expect our girls to live in an isolated manner insulating from the society or people around.
4. Education, job, professional and life skills of working and living anywhere in the world needs to be given to them by providing them such oppurtunities.
IF THIS IS NOT DONE NO MAN CAN LIVE IN PEACE OR HORMONY IN FUTURE!!!...AS NO GIRL WILL TAKE IT LYING DOWN!!!
rams
hai all...do you agree that SELF CONFIDENCE is the most important thing required to live on this earth?
the basic of life to be alive is ability to get food, water, air, protective clothes, shelter and ability to protect from threats (recently sex also got added...i.e reproductive need...procreation (not recreation!!)). One should be able to get all these by own self. One should not depend on others for any of these. If this ability is there, then SELF CONFIDENCE WILL EXIST. Otherwise the individual WILL NOT HAVE SELF CONFIDENCE. This can take any turn from living a slavery life to committing suicide.
Self confidence emanates and increases in us as we grow...develop...through gaining of:-
1. knowledge
2. life skills
3. professional skills
4. experience in life and profession
In the past, girls were not given this by our culture and society. They were only taught house hold chores. They were not given education to seek a decent employment.They were made dependent on husband, mother, father, brothers, in-laws (father in law, mother in law, brother in law, sister in law...and all such laws), relatives etc. It was convenient to the men as they felt she can not run away or has no scope for any act to go against the system or away from the family. Even the social justice or customs and traditions of the society was keeping the women submissive. So, they lacked self confidence.
They had only their body and knowledge, skills related to house chores only as the asset to get the basic needs fulfilled. They only had professional skills related to making of things of use at home. Their life skills were related to managing the behaviours of all at home in a combined family system.
As she lacked self confidence she was all the time having fear in the mind. She perceived every one and every thing as threat. Parents and brothers were threats. Though she had confidence in them (as there was no otherway for survival and dependence), she also had a fear of 'hope they don't ditch me!'...'they don't show partiality!' etc...
this continued with husband...being suspicious...checking everything...other day one of my friend's wife told me 'i know each minute where he is what he doing and whom he is talking to!'...what does this show?...poor lady was feeling proud of this!!!...
so, they were always parasites, scared each second, perceiving threats from every one, every thing, every life situation from all directions and in all dimensions...this is what is depicted in TV serials...so, they can never breath freedom, can never have happiness, peace, harmony, good social relationships, feel like committing suicide or running away...
total dependence and total parasitic living leads to destructive possessiveness...because the organism does not want to leave the person or place or life situation that is giving feeling of comfort for it...so it wants to possess that...in such an environment the person will have very low self confidence, low self esteem, will not be able to do any job properly...mind and body will always be stressed to the chore and higher limits...they are always slaves, feel caged, trapped, no escape...they live in 'learned helplessness'…they had to accept that ‘this is the way life goes on here!’…the other ladies also counselled them to accept things as they are and change as per the demands of others around quoting their own lives.
then how they lived???....how they felt happiness???...because they physically got the basic needs like food, clothing, shelter, air and sex (though for few seconds or minutes and the poor ladies perceived the ‘approaches’ or ‘attractions’ or ‘warming up’ behaviours as love!!!).
Their biggest strength for psychological or emotional support were their kids!!!...they showed love to them in abundance and got back also from the kids. So, their psychological needs got met to an extent. Animals, gardens or fields were there at home to which they got attached so much that their unconditional love needs got met. So, though there were tortures, uncertainties, fear of unknown, they could live or survive because of nature, animals and kids.
So, the crux is
1. Self confidence is the most important thing required for a girl..i.e ability to earn all the basic needs, life comforts and live a life of dignity, freedom and equivalence without differentiation and discrimination.
2. The society is changing and it is beyond anybody’s control. So, there is no other way other than to change our culture, life styles, beliefs, customs and traditions.
3. We can not live or expect our girls to live in an isolated manner insulating from the society or people around.
4. Education, job, professional and life skills of working and living anywhere in the world needs to be given to them by providing them such oppurtunities.
IF THIS IS NOT DONE NO MAN CAN LIVE IN PEACE OR HORMONY IN FUTURE!!!...AS NO GIRL WILL TAKE IT LYING DOWN!!!
rams
No comments:
Post a Comment