Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL PARENTS AND THEIR CHILDREN...every one is interested in creating an image about them in the mind of others...a good image...1. to attract the attention of others...to get their attention...to make others give them importance of attention, listening, importance etc...to make others accept them as their friends in social groups.....2. for a 'feeling of acceptance'!
Why?...because these are initial steps of socialisation!...Human beings being social animals can not live with out interacting with others for a healthy mind.
During adolescence it happens naturally through the aging process by Nature. They make hundreds and thousands of contacts, acquaintances, friendships etc. And it continues throughout life at all ages at home, in organisations, amidst friends, relatives and in other social set ups!!
So, every one tries to attract the attention, importance and listening of others towards him/her for a feeling of acceptance for good mental health and living.
Adolescents being powerless, without money, wealth, job, fame etc resort to possessing valuable and trendy or fashionable stuff like clothes, costly accessories on body, latest mobiles, good appearance etc (exercise, make-overs etc). While they talk they talk about the foreign countries they visited, adventures they have done etc to make their friends say 'Whavvvvvvv...what a lucky guy you are!' 'You are rich man!' 'your girl friend is soo beautiful!' etc.
This need continues throughout life...identities like best college, best course, best job, abroad trips, MNC, high salary etc during early 20s....Jobs that give power, fame, security (e.g IAS, MNC), owning palatial house, high end car, admitting children in costly and best schools during late 20s and thirties....becoming member of Lions club, Rotary club etc in Middle age and bearing a saint look etc in old age. The journey of 'impressing' 'image creation' for feeling of acceptance goes on!!
All the methods of creating an identity or image will not live for a long time. They are temporary and the image or feeling of acceptance we get are all temporary. Fake!!...The relationships and people we get in life through this also are temporary.
Image formation and feeling of acceptance we get using ......
1. knowledge, experience, wisdom, giving these both at free of cost (true service) to others without discrimination....
2. good, positive, cheerful, adorable, pleasing, calm, cool, noble personality traits attract others towards us for a permanent relationship...and such relationships will remain forever, make good, strong and life long relationships which will further strengthen your personality, relationships, fame, authority etc.
So, parents should stop gaining image, impressions, power, fame, feeling of acceptance etc through costly stuff, wealth, money, memberships etc and use the above two methods, so that children also will follow them and will not make hollow relationships, hollow peace, hollow happiness, hollow image, hollow mental and social health, hollow life and finally land up with Depression and start learning about life at the fag end of life!!
Peacefully yours...rams...Health Psychologist!!
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