THIS IS FOR ALL PRESENT AND FUTURE HUSBANDS!!.....FOR ALL THOSE WHO WANT TO LIVE IN THE HEART OF THEIR GIRLS!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL PRESENT AND FUTURE HUSBANDS!!.....FOR ALL THOSE WHO WANT TO LIVE IN THE HEART OF THEIR GIRLS!!

Yesterday i happened to meet a young adult boy in his late twenties...who was sad...when asked he said 'sir...i tried many girls...onnum set aavala...(nothing worked out)...all resulted in break-up...all my loves were only failures...finally i accepted to the torture of my parents...i agreed to marry a girl as per their choice and wish...it is just two weeks that we have been talking...but i am sure it is not going to work out...namakku arranged marriage yellaam work out aavaathu sir...(for me arranged marriage will not work out!)...she is soooo adamant and does not match with me!!'

Then i spoke to him about many things which i type here...one among them i have given here...

How to win in love?...How to win a boy's heart or a girl's heart?
How to secure a permanent place in her heart?..How to be successful in a marriage?...How to be successful as a husband or wife?

One can't be peaceful and successful in married life or in any relationship with a girl by just keeping her body inside the four walls...the peace and success dawns in life only when you live in her heart and permanently secure that place!!...It does not come by demands, wants, needs and expectations...quoting Indian Penal Code, code of conduct, societal rules and regulations, duties and responsibilities as husband and wife etc...or rules and regulations of Indian familial form of living!!

A girl forms as the first cell in her mother's embryo!

She grows with the blood and bones of her mother!

She takes birth and grows in the bosom of her mother!!...Seeing her sparkling eyes with unconditional love...as an infant, as a child, as a student, as an adolescent...as an early adult....for more than 20+ years!!

She grows in the arms, shoulders and laps of her father...learns to face the society...learns to see the Nature around...Learns to experience the good and bad...while she is under the safe wings of her father and mother...on the safest earth under their feet provided by them!!

Every cell...every belief...every personality trait...every thought...every feeling...every behaviour...all she learns from these two people who shower unconditional love from the first cell to a fully developed adult ready to face the professional organisations...social organisations...the community around...the societies around in the state and country...to face the world...to face this universe!!!

Now....you enter her life!!

You think she will be ready to leave this safest haven where she lived for 20+ years??

I am not referring to her city or home...i am referring to the domain of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE!!...

I am not referring to the two people called father and mother...or two human bodies with their names what ever they are!!...i am referring to the RELATIONSHIP CALLED FATHER AND MOTHER??...Her perceptions of love and affection, a feeling of pride, a feeling of confidence, a feeling of self-concept she gets, a feeling of safety she feels, a feeling of freedom she feels, a feeling of the social envelope...You think she would like to leave?

Therefore, first BECOME HER MOTHER...by showing all the unconditional love she had!!....BE HER FATHER with that unconditional support in all her endeavours and ventures!!...She will automatically accept you and make you live in her heart as her HUSBAND...LOVER...BEST FRIEND EVER IN HER LIFE...SOUL MATE!!

Same way, the girl also should know that he is out of his mothers bosom and lap where he was born, grown and has lived for 20+ years...He has come out of his father's shoulders where he leaned from an infant to a child to a small boy to an adolescent and to an adult man for all the encouragement and support!!...So, she has to first BECOME HIS MOTHER showing that unconditional love...and then HIS FATHER giving the unconditional support...in motivating and encouraging all his endeavours...then automatically she will live in his heart as the BEST WIFE...BEST FRIEND...SOUL MATE!!

You think such people will fail in love?...Fail in married life?...How nice the family or home they will make will be...Is it not??

If both of them start showing big lists of demands, wants, needs and expectations....like a business store....behave like HUSBAND AND WIFE...then obviously they will fail in their loves...break-ups and divorce will become unavoidable...and life will be a miserable failure...with deep unhealing wounds for entire life time!!

all the best...

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!