Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...
The olden concept in our culture for girls and ladies is "Veeday Ulagam" (in tamil)...i.e 'Home is the World!'
With this they entrapped the girls at home doing only home chores and services to people at home. As individuals they never were allowed to grow the skills, knowledge and get the feeling of acceptance from organisations and society through their knowledge and skills.
They were expected to know only the knowledge related to home issues and skills required to be a home maker.
Today parents are sending the girls to schools and colleges. Some of the changed people (fathers, husbands, mothers and mother in laws) even send the girls for job...for the purpose of deriving satisfaction through work, skills and knowledge display on job....through achievements...through their contribution for humanity...science and technology development...development of nation...organisations etc. This is a welcome change.
So, these people define the above statement as 'Ulagamey veeedu!"...(in tamil)...i.e "World is your home!" (not "home is your world!").
But still the people in rural areas and those rural minded people who live in urban areas still are primitive...they send them to good schools and colleges...grow them competitive for just their own ego satisfaction...and with the concept that 'today, for getting married or getting a good match, the girl should have at least two or three degrees!' (only degrees...not knowledge or skills or employability)...so, still the purpose of education is to get them married off!!...So, after that they live a life of 'Home is the world!'...No human being can be happy this way!!...They can only exist in a 'Learned Helplessness' state of mind. They can only live a TV serial type of life...can have only personality traits similar to the TV serial characters!!...Then where is peace at home...happiness in family...health in social relationships!!
Though the 'combined family system' of the past had few advantages it was a failure system!!...Failure model!!...Only the egoistic males who want to rule and be dictators, who want every one to serve them, will say that old system was right.
The new system, with certain other social support systems will become a correct model.
Today with world of oppurtunities for education and work, the definition has to be changed to 'World is home!'. There are soo many places to be visited on this earth...so many things to learn...so many things to see...so many things to listen to...so many people to meet...so many institutions to learn...so many organisations to work for learning new things (not to earn money and wealth!...it just runs behind you as an outcome!!)...soo many things to feel...true complete enlightenment happens when we visit and live in places of different culture, different languages, different/extreme climates, different terrains, different adaptation situations in life...So, the only oppurtunity of living on this earth should not be lost in only being servant maids inside homes for entire life....only home changes before and after marriage....but the quality of life and living is the same...enslaved...trapped!!
Humanity or nations or science or technology or anything can not develop with only one half of the gender contributing...
It is sad to see that girls crying on telephone...wait in queue to cry on phones regarding the life they live...the kind of people they have in their life and homes...the kind of belief systems they have...
The biggest enemies are only the pigeon-brained relatives who keep torturing with suggestions and questions...every parent....every student or child should have strong back bone to teach those primitive minded...change them...or leave them...march ahead in life...in the world...on this earth...
Remember...life is only once...no change again...and age to travel, learn, experience etc are only once...once the age or phase of life changes the need or urge or interest also will go away...but gets repressed and buried in the subconscious mind as a garbage and makes the inner mind to stink like a sewage tank...and does not allow us to be contented, happy and peaceful from inner-self.
So, liberate the girls...
"world is home!"...living home is only a part of bigger entity called life!!
(some times i feel like recording all the sobbing and cries of who come to me, with anonymity, and upload it here so that people feel the sufferings of people and can change...especially the selfish fathers, helpless mothers, dictator in-laws, egoistic and parasitic husbands!!)
Peacefully yours....Rams...Psychologist!!
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