THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY PRESENT AND FUTURE PARENTS...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY PRESENT AND FUTURE PARENTS...

When i observe all the people around...most of them have many developmental issues causing personality disorders in them...which causes them to be without peace, with unhealthy relationships, unhappy with their own selves and of course with others too!!...Some how every one is managing and they feel 'that is how life is!'

The issues are due to....

1. Developmental issues and negative parenting...i.e every human being is supposed to be exposed to challenges commensurate with age...so that they LEARN...GROW...MATURE...EVOLVE...to face the next stage of life...this happens from the first cell inside the womb...

But our mothers are tooo emotional...loving and caring their children...they want to feel their love in all caring activities...that the child does not learn things at the right age...

Both the parents do not allow the child to cry or suffer or try to face a challenge and win...learn...parents want to do everything by themselves and not allowing the child to do...so, the child does not learn things at the right age...

The children do not have freedom to express or pursue their dreams...feelings...emotions...experiences...needs...wants...beliefs...expectations...passion...love...thoughts...relationships etc. So, they suppress or control and use several other defence mechanisms and land up with psychological disorders

There are several developmental issues like this...

1. some do not get enough love and affection
2. many children grow up amidst disharmony between parents...
3. poverty...
4. single parent grooming due to one parent away...or dead..or separated...
5. other family issues...
6. too many controls from parents, that adequate knowledge and skill development in all domains required for living does not take place...
7. no decision making skills as all decisions taken by parents...
8. no analytical skills

like this there are many...

2. There are several cultural issues too...

a. fear culture...we make the children to fear for every one and everything...this affects the overall personality development...no boldness...being shy...

b. admitting children in only boys school or girls only school...this makes them not to get oppurtunity to understand the opposite sex...this is a must because they will have to live with an opposite sex for entire life and also work in organisations with opposite sex. Lack of this leads to marital disharmony and failure in profession.

c. not allowing the boys and girls to mingle freely

d. there is no structured and proper academic sexual education... so, they learn all incorrect or wrong things...from films and internet videos...form false beliefs with insatiable expectations.

3. there are heredity issues too...when the parents or ancestors had psychological issues, then it descends tol the off-springs too., mind and social needs...to a level of parasitic dependence...to a level that the other person is unable to satiate the needs...obviously the relationship suffers...all sorts of negative emotions emerge.

These are only a few....there is a big host of reasons...

All these show that...

1. Our parenting style needs to be changed
2. Our culture needs to be changed...i,e our beliefs...our life style...our definitions on various things like family, life, living, relationships, love, profession...etc...

If we want our future generations to live peacefully as individuals and as a part of family, organisation and society!!

First parents should know...so that they can use right parenting style and apply cultural corrections in the grooming process!!

About each issue we will see in details later...

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!