dear all...there are two things...'understanding' and 'feeling'...most of the issues with which we fight or strain our relationships with people at home and outside are to do with 'feeling'...If some one has not undergone that life experience, then they will only understand at the maximum if they give ears to listen and put-in efforts to understand. But if they have undergone the same issue in life, then they will feel and understand. This will meet our expectations and there will be no issues or fights or strains in relationships due to mismatch in the 'feelings'!! e.g a lover girl with intense feelings on a boy might feel frustrated if the boy is also not reciprocating with the same crushhhhhhhh or intense feelings. He will not be able to do that if he has not felt intense feelings of same type with her or with any one. At the maximum he can only understand and exhibit some responsible behaviours without feelings!!... so, if we want some one to understand our feelings, then we have to make them undergo the same process...but few are not possible for men e.g child bearing and delivery. Daughters fight with their mothers during teens but after they bear a child and deliver they can feel all the ordeals of their mother and they become close to their mother!!....Rams.
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