problem faced by people who work abroad...when they come back home...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

one question...one answer...

Qn: "I worked for Merchant Navy for about 10 years. Those days i was young and i liked that job. But now i don't like being away from family. I want to be with my family. I am not getting a good job that can pay me so much like Merchant Navy. My wife is kicking me to go back to Merchant Navy. Every day fight at home. I am depressed!!"

Ans: There are two reasons.

One....when the husbands work away from family and earn a good sum for the family, the wife and children start living a lavish or more comfortable life. When the husbands come back home for some reason, when the salary reduces, the family is not in a position to accept the change or reduction in standard of living. So, they compel the guy to go back.

second...when the husband or wife is away for many years, the people at home adapt themselves for a living with out husband / father / mother. When they come back, it is all good for few days. After that the same person is perceived as an alien or an outsider or a third person, as it disturbs their adapted living. Also in our fantastic useless 'vetti' culture where our people are interested in knowing about the life of others, the relatives or neighbours start spreading rumours about this guy/lady. So, the family wants that person to go back to stop the rumours and continue with their old happy and peaceful life.

the answer is clear...

1. The person living away has to grow like a banian tree, adding multiple skills and knowledge in different jobs, may be high paid jobs, so that due to any circumstance if the person has to leave the job and go back to the native place, he or she can find a equally or near-by paid job, though it is difficult.

2. Family also has to understand the physical and mental inability of the person or dynamic and tough job markets of today and accept his or her decision. Interests also keep changing as age and stage in life changes.

3. Good savings while earning good.

4. Counselling all the family members concerned.

5. Being conscious about this fact that 'one day he or she will come back' and preparing for such an eventuality, which is certain to occur one day, both by the family and the individual.

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist.