Thursday, 8 October 2015

HOW TO SELECT YOUR LIFE MATE?...how to select a match for your son/daughter?...how to be a successful person in organisations?

Hai all…IMPORTANT FOR PARENTS, STUDENTS AND WORKING PROFESSIONALS…

we have two types of people in any organization.

1.      1.  Karma yogis…(e.g real scientists, real teachers, real doctors and nurses, real politicians, real bureaucrats, and anyone doing any type of job irrespective of his hierarchical position in the organisation or doing any private job) these people believe that work is worship. They treat their office as temple, things which they use for work as Gods, and the process of working is a prayer or offering service to God. They also believe that they are born to do service and life is all about enjoying doing work. They enjoy doing their work. They get totally involved, immersed, dedicated, dissolved and lose themselves in their job. They are generally called as workaholics.

They don’t look for any incentives or promotions. They enjoy working. They derive happiness, peace, contentment, good mental and social health in the process of working. Though they work for a result they don’t get demotivated from the result of their work.

They don’t unnecessarily talk to others. They don’t generally fight or feel negatives with people and therefore their relationships with others, i.e their social health also remains happy and peaceful. As such they have no time to talk to others and do other things than their jobs in office.

Of course, the home centric and homely wives may not be happy with their husbands in some areas. But if they are matured, understand these personalities, then they will strike a balance and find happiness and peace in their lives with positive perceptions. But if the wives are also karma yogis, working in the job related to their passion, interest, skill sets etc then they will also be like their husbands. If they work out a way of living, reproducing and rearing suitable for them then their life will be cool. But if they also perceive their family life like others or if they have oldies at home who expect or want their children’s life to be like that of others, then life will not be cool…it will be red hot!! No one can be happy in that house and it will be a good example for a hell!!

So, when we look for matches for our children we should not look at caste, religion, wealth, status, education etc…we need to tell the children to see If their passions, way of living, definition of life, interests, value systems, beliefs, morals and ethics, value they give for human beings, relationships etc  match with the other person…the families should detach from the two young people…if they attach and enter into these listed above, which are their privacies, then life will become hell for all in the house…instead, if they remain detached while being attached, then that is the best. If the oldies of both sides are also karma yogis then that is the best thing to happen. Because these oldies cannot remain idle and will do something and lose themselves in that. So, no disturbance to anyone.

Coming to the organizational perspective…

Some of these karma yogis are rigid personalities, not flexible and therefore do not align with the organizational goals and the path decided by the boss to reach the goals. They will be rigid about their results, path, time lines and everything. This becomes problematic to the organisation and the boss. So, generally they are left in their own path by the organisation and the boss if both of them cannot do anything with that person (i.e transfer, dismiss etc).

Some of them are flexible with the boss and the organizational goals…i.e end results, time lines and the process or path of achieving the goals. They are liked by all.

Some of them like remaining in the same place of living, organisation, section and doing the same job…they are happy being with the same people around…they are those ‘cozy’ people who feel any change is a threat. They are highly security centric. So, they might not go up in the hierarchical ladder of the organisation. But they will be happy as they feel work is worship; they dissolve and lose themselves in their jobs.

Some of them focus on both PERFORMANCE and POTENTIAL. I.e though they are karma yogis, they remain in their conscious world of appreciation and promotions, appointments, oppurtunities (work / education abroad etc). So they invest time and energy for growing their potential too. If they are not aware of these things then the bosses should identify them, ‘deep select’ such people, mentor them, groom them so that they become assets for the organisation, country and society.

2.       2. The second type of people in organizations are those who work for incentives. That is if they don’t get what they want e.g salary hike, additional incentives, promotions or anything they value as their ‘need’ from their organisation, they will get demotivated.

They are not karma yogis. They come to organizations for some tangible benefits more than survival or basic living needs. Their self esteem will be high only if these tangible needs are met in the organisation.

These people will live a stress free, anxiety free, cool, peaceful, happy, healthy, contented and successful life if they enjoy the process i.e their work, social processes in their teams etc and If they ‘work towards’ getting their tangibles and not ‘working for’ getting their tangibles. But many of such people are generally anxiety struck, full of stress (about whether they will get their tangibles or not?), start learning health compromising behaviours as coping skills to fight their anxiety and stress, become ‘milk men’ milking their cows (subordinates / employees), self centric (of course, some of them project good leadership skills too) and get diseases of body, personality, mind and relationships.

Such people stop working moment they don’t get what they want. Some of them leave the organisation. Some of them remain and create social issues in the organizations until they understand that life is much more than these tangibles.
The biggest issue here is what should their bosses do?...how the bosses should decide to give the tangibles ie perks, incentives, promotions, oppurtunities etc out of the above two types???…

i.e if you are a boss in an organisation, and If you have both karma yogis and the people of second types in an organisation and if you are in a situation that you have only limited things in hand to offer and therefore have to decide critically between the two types of people…whom to give??

Can we leave the karma yogis uncared as they will anyway work as they are not looking for anything additional from the organisation??

If the boss decides to give the tangible to the second type person who will stop working if he does not get that tangible, is it correct?

Can any one answer this question??

Anyway…the crux of the issue here is….

1.       Don’t be a karmayogi of ‘not bothered’ variety
2.       Don’t be the ‘second type’ person also. It is extremely difficult to live a peaceful and contented life all the time.

3.       BE A KARMA YOGI WHILE BEING CONSCIOUS ABOUT LIFE LONG IMPROVEMENT IN PERFORMANCE AND POTENTIAL (i.e knowledge, wisdom, skills and experience) (e.g Dr APJ Abdul Kalam, My most illustrious college senior!!!)

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