Dear all...when two people are in love, before marriage or after marriage, if both are not in 'intense feelings' domain, then it is the best state to exist. This happens when their body and mind are stable, no intense emotional need/support required, their brain is perceiving good security consciousness, they are balanced, they will think realistically, logically and handle the emotional or body need situations effectively and positively.
Out of the two, if one is experiencing intense feelings, then that means that person is probably experiencing a less security feeling in the conscious or subconscious mind, so looking for emotional support, lots of physical presence, virtual or mental presence, hugs, kisses, words of praise-love-affection-assuring words of physical-mental-financial-legal-social-personal-emotional security....etc...
But if these intense needs are not met that person will suspect the other person, monitor, police, use all the intelligence to sniff the back, will not think about any other thing in life, will not do any chores, will say 'he does not love me...he has many more lovers...he must be flirting now...we have to monitor and control otherwise they will run away, every girl wants to snatch my husband, i need to keep talking to him continuously otherwise he will forget me, the love will go off, they will keep asking 'do you love me?...do you miss me?...and if they get positive answers which they expect, with feelings, then they will be better...if their needs of physical presence and others are met then they will feel the ultimate love and affection and shower back also...if not, all the negative thinking, emotions and behaviors will arise......demand, control, shout, abuse, hate, ...then life becomes hell...here the other person with less intense love controls the relationship...he takes it going...
if both experience highly intense feelings, then, if the needs listed above are met by both through the other person then some feeling peace prevails...else both will suspect each other...all the negatives listed will be shown by both on each other...god only can save their peace, happiness, health etc and of course, their relationship too. So, keeping the feelings regulated, the physical health in place is the remedy.
rams
good constructive and value adding comments....
this is just the opposite of the intense feelings felt in devotion. Devotion means deep love with intensity. So there are several layers to this.
In devotion, there is no insecurity feeling or no doubts whatsoever. As there are no needs either in devotion. So you can enjoy intense feelings without which life is such a bore in devotion.
Mediocrity and average feelings are so boring leading to average lives! Intensity is what makes life beautiful. So have devotion where you can enjoy intensity without all these needs, stability, control etc (the words that are so annoying anyways).
If everyone is just having average feelings then there will not be any art forms either. Music, dance etc are about intensity of emotions.
if it is real love, any kind of intense feelings that you are talking about will slowly change to devotion. Life played too safely taking care not to cross any set boundaries is very dull and boring.
Enthusiasm is the best state. And there also there is intensity. So intensity and detachment go hand in hand. We need to be intelligent enough when to feel intensely and when to detach and let go. Both are required.
yes...agree...devotion to a person or object or animal not existing and having intense feelings is good....even having intense feelings in devotion to a person or object which is existing but not available to show intense feelings is also good...having intense feelings in devotion to a person or object or animal that is existing and available to show intense feelings is the best...!!
i agree...i only talked about a situation where filmi love is experienced by people and the issue of intense feelings in that environment...i left out the condition of 'intense feelings in devotion while being stable and doing chores'
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