poor brides and bridegrooms!

here is a TV programme called 'kalyana maalai'...i happened to watch for a while...where the boy's side and girl's side advertise their sons and daughters for marriage...every parent says 'we are looking for a beautiful girl. Veettukku adakkamana ponna irukkanum'...i.e A homely girl who can get along with all at home'...not even one says 'we want a matching girl for our son' (though this is also wrong)...no one wants to adapt to others...every one wants that the girl should adapt to every one at home!

there is a TV programme called 'kalyana maalai'...i happened to watch for a while...where the boy's side and girl's side advertise their sons and daughters for marriage...every parent says 'we are looking for a beautiful girl. Veettukku adakkamana ponna irukkanum'...i.e A homely girl who can get along with all at home'...not even one says 'we want a matching girl for our son' (though this is also wrong)...no one wants to adapt to others...every one wants that the girl should adapt to every one at home!

 

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•  all these expectations create such a Mahabharata war at home for the rest of their lives with in laws and spouses! I think the best one can ask for is a girl or boy with 1. good values and commitment 2. who is cheerful and can make one laugh and 3. who will support partner with his / her life's ambitions!

   
•  well said , you summed it up nicely!
• If we hire an Engineer for some position,then the advt should be like"Graduate Engineer with MBA,Smart go getter,willing to work hard,transferable position-may apply.It should not be like 'Idiots with +2, 3 attempts failed, arrogant,lazy and adament persons reqiuired.So when we define a personality for a non committed position,what else could be the description for a life long commitment occupation?JK recommends to marry a beautiful girl and he assures that she would take care of the rest!
• ....what i am pointing out is the 'mentality of the parents'...that they are looking for a girl for the family first,i don't know if at all they look anything for the boy, as if she is going to live with them...what if she lives in a different country and different city...with minimal or zero contact with others here...i will not advertise for my children in any forum...if at all i am told how would you advertise, i will just say 'i am looking for a guy who can adapt to my daughter and she can adapt to him'...i will also give my contact phone, and if some one contacts me i will ask them to talk to my child...that is it...she or he will decide whether the boy or girl is fit for adapting or not.

   
• yes...for me nothing matters other than 'my child's happiness!' ...that is all..

   
• this is the meaning of life,rams.

   
• i will not say the girl should be 'adakkamaana ponnu and should serve us or listen to us etc'...in fact i would say other wise....'adangaatha ponnu...full of joy...full of happiness...full of peace...full of freedom...is what we would like to have'...

   
• It is always pointed out Sita to be a perfect wife for Rama.Only once and only once she dis obeyed Rama-she went to the jungle with him.Rest was an Ithihaas,

   
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• "...ramayan and mahabharat were all written by men who formed the culture here...women as servants and slaves...houses as an organisations where the man had all control and authority...even in an organisation, manager is ffffffool if he works only with his 'brain' and the other 'bodies'...intelligent is one who uses the brains of all in the organisation and his brain only to synergise the energies of others'...let us not follow mahabharat and ramayan to the word of it...let us only take things which are applicable to the times and move on...i remember a joke...the husband told his wife 'You know, if thiruvalluvar called his wife vasuki, she will leave the rope even if she is taking water out of the well, and run to her husband!'...the wife replied 'first you become like a thiruvalluvar and write a thirukkural, then i will also run to you like a vasuki!'...so, first let us be like Ram in all respects and thereafter expect our wives to be Sitas...let us make our sons to be Rams (not this 'rams' (smile)) and then look for a sita for our rams!...we are too good in 'expecting' and fuck all in being one like that!...we don't have to expect, order, control and demand...if we are rams, then our wives will automatically be sitas...if our sons are rams, then they will automatically get their sitas...'varuvathu thaaney varum!...varuvathu thaaney varum!'...Jai Hind!

   

  rams