what is the relationship between 'possessiveness' and 'mind'?

dear all...lust brings in possessiveness...but possessiveness is a feeling of the mind...it is not sensed on the body...it is felt in the mind...but it is related to the body!!!

so, some people if they feel that 'my person is only lusting with the other person, but the mind is only full of me!!', then they probably feel less possessiveness...

but if the person feels 'my person only lusts with me and the mind is full of some other person!!' then the possessiveness is more...

so...so..so...

1. possessiveness is related to the body....lust...like...

2. but it is felt in the mind

3. so, who is in the mind decides the amount of possessiveness....

rams

Is my definition of Love and Lust correct???

dear all...some might think that love and lust can not be separated by the way i say...they feel lust is related to mind also...and love is related to body also....but the truth is Lust can not be experienced or satiated without the body...and Love can not be felt with out the presence of the mind...!!!

that is why i say...love is related to mind....lust is related to the body!!!

rams

 a comment...

hmmm. don't know what to say. unless you feel love, you don't feel like kissing, hugging etc. so they cannot be completely separated out like this. Mental intimacy may lead to physical intimacy as an expression of intimacy! yetho, eppadiyaavathu pogatum! Different scenarios exist i guess! So physical intimacy can be used to strengthen the love or can be just used to satiate body needs! So all depends on individuals!

my reply....

 when body needs, its best friend, the mind helps...that is all...same way, when mind needs, the good friend, body, helps...that is all...so here the good and best friend of body and mind support each other...but the main stay of lust is body and the main stay of love is mind...hope it is ok!!

another dimension of Lust and Love...you will certainly enjoy....

Dear all…as you know, we can type volumes and volumes on love and lust…the most troubling issues of life!!...here is one new thing…

Love is felt by mind only as peace, happiness, calmness, cool, contented, successful, secure etc through people or relationships or places or items or life events. It does not give craving feeling. We don’t become possessive with such people or things. But we enjoy them and the very thought of them. We don’t consciously think about them always but subconsciously we keep thinking about them and they keep giving us directions of life, happiness, peace, good health, success etc which are the ‘pillars of life’ and living!!...so, we need to have more people, places, events and items we love. More they are, more we will be happy and peaceful. Loving does not affect the life of the person being loved. They can be alive or dead or non existent. They can be married or unmarried or old or young. Nothing matters. Because the person is what he or she is and what is giving us all the ‘pillars of life’ is not the person but our PERCEPTION OF LOVING AND THE thinking, behaviours and emotions we feel while loving…

Love is one end of the spectrum.

Now the Lust or Like…it focusses only on the body…body needs…i.e water, air, food, shelter, clothing, sex, physical intimacy etc…not related to mind…many can lust with out any love…many can lust many on earth…at the same time too…many can not lust with out any love feeling…these combined with the others can exist only during a part of our life cycle and can change after some time…i.e some might lust without love some times but later after reaching some stage in life might lust only if they feel love…so, unpredictable…!!...Lust gives pleasure, the craving one, which spoils the peace…It can make one possessive…more the lust, more the possessiveness…less the lust, less the possessiveness….but the possessiveness will lost only till the need satiation resourcefulness remains in the source…once the resourcefulness is lost then lust goes off…then the relationship breaks off…physically or mentally or both…

Lust is another end of the spectrum.

Now both love and lust can coexist…this is a troublesome relationship…because it has possessiveness, greed, and all other negative thinking, emotions and behaviours associated with it….during the initial stage in life when lust is more and love is more or less, possessiveness is more…and all sorts of negatives also are present…gives more pleasure…craving is more…less ‘pillars of life’ if love is less….so, amount of love during the initial stages of life decides the amount of ‘pillars of life’ we get amidst the negatives…

aging reduces the lust component…so, as we age the lust reduces, maturation increases with acquiring of knowledge and wisdom, possessiveness can decrease, craving reduces, more ‘pillars of life’…and love can increase….

Nature has produced us with the body...so it drives people for lust as without lust procreation can not go on on earth….and for rearing children a kind of possessiveness is essential…..once the production cycle is over, the gynaec system goes dormant, lust reduces, and possessiveness also reduces…

Nature has produced us with mind and therefore it pushes us to fall in love with people, places, items, relationships, life events etc so that the satiation of mind needs also get met….

More later…I am feeling hungry…bye….

peacefully yours....rams...health psychologist....

should we run around to people for satiation of our needs?

Dear all…all of us have needs of body and mind…we look forward to others for fullfillment of these needs…more we bank on others for our needs, more disappointed we will be, sad we will be, frustrated we will be, angry we will be…and we kill and waste our health and precious life time. More we depend on our own selves and Nature, more we will be happy…

Also we bank on one person for all sorts of relationships…all sorts of needs…whereas Nature has given us many around us for fulfillment of our needs!!...we also think that we have to run around, go around to find people to fulfill our needs…but the truth is if we are good human beings, which we are supposed to be as per Nature, then we will find a person in front of us to give that need, sent by Nature, when ever we feel for that need!!

So, the crux is

1.       Nature, the creator, knows our need…as we are  a part of it…and it has in it and produced many people, things, places etc to fulfill our needs…

2.       It sends us to them or send them to us when we need

3.       We don’t have to run around for them or those

4.       Provided…provided…we need to be noble, good and loving to all…

because...because...because...when we are good, we will always have many good people around us...connected through some means or the other...and they will know our needs....and do the needful for satiation of our needs....

so, it is Nature(al) and it naturally happens...so, it can be said that Nature does not send people to us...but when we are Nature(al), Nature(ally) good, we get all good people around...and that is how nature sends them to us!!!

(I type only my personal experience…my thought process…not read from any book or heard from others…)

peacefully yours...rams...health psychologist...

how do we learn the value of things in life...???

dear all...just now i was talking to a person...he said 'sir, my mother is seriously ill due to aging and she is living far away and i am unable to do anything!!....there is no one to cook lunch for her...i have employed a servant who just makes 4 chappaathis for lunch and goes...nothing more than that!!...and i pay Rs.1000/- per month!!'. He says 'i used to waste lots of food earlier...now i understand the value of money, energy, time, service, love and affection of others, relationships, people and a life, my mothers life!!

only when we lose something we know the value of that....

when hospitalized we know the value of health...

when the finger gets cut and we use only the remaining fingers to eat, we know the value of that one finger....

the value of parents if they die suddenly....

the value of children if they fall ill or die....

the value of love when we lose it...

the value of people when they leave us....

the value of relationship after the break up....

value of eyes after we lose the eye sight...

value of hearing after we lose it....

value of tongue once we lose the taste....

like this the list is endless...

but we know the value of money, wealth, fame etc when we have them also...and of course after we lose them too....

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

rams

value of life, relationships and sources of happiness and peace....

dear all...a diamond is made after lots of hard work...but little fire makes it carbon!!...the little dew drops are heavens of happiness as long as they are not destroyed by heat!!...a hen is many years of eggy-health, taste and lots of fun and love if kept alive, else a heap of shit in no time!!...so anything in nature is made artistic with tons of love, happiness and peace....when it is destroyed for a small pleasure we lose the life long happiness and a great relationship!!!...people who do not know the value of life and relationships kill them for short time pleasures!!

rams

Is 'difficult' really difficult??

dear all....difficulty is a perception....that we are weak....for others it is not a difficulty...and even for us the same thing is not difficult when our mind formed is strong and it can muster the resources to cross the difficulty easily....so difficulty is not really difficulty...it is the state of mind at that moment which makes us to perceive like that!!....it again may be due to weak physical or social health or both....!!

even when we feel something as difficult, if some one comes and gives an idea to cross it we don't feel the difficulty any more difficult!!!...so actually there is no difficulty in the difficult thing...it is only in our minds!!!

RAMS

how to find time to love and romance....

dear all...there is always a crib between lovers and spouses that one has time for talks, loves, romance, sharing feelings-thoughts-opinions-emotions etc and the other does not have....and the situation changes some times that the busy person gets time and the idle person gets busy.....so, effectively one person is always busy and the other person has time o' time!!

so, the best funda is.....1. both should be busy same time....doing all the jobs, chores, duties and responsibilities etc...2. both should be free same time so that all the social dynamics can take place together....

rams

how simple it is to be physically, mentally and socially healthy!!!

dear all...what is the secret of being physically, mentally and socially healthy....haa.haa..haa...it is soooooooooooooooooo simple....!!

1. to be physically healthy 'just keep moving'!!!

2. to be mentally healthy 'just love everything around, be numb and accept everything that is happening in your life as the 'wish of the God!' and go through it with all smiles without resisting it!!'

3. to be socially healthy 'just love all!!'

if this health is there, then peace and contentment will also be there...

what else we need on earth???

haa..haa..haa...how simple, is it not???

rams...health psychologist...

a fantastic thing about 'brain' and 'love'!!

dear all...today's reading...i read a post which says brain is a fantastic organ which works and thinks 24 hours and 365 days continuously till you fall in love!!...and a comment says 'if you think then you can not fall in love!'...

yes...it is true...no one thinks 'i am going to love him!' and starts loving...it is feeling that happens on its own, suddenly, without any conscious process...of course, it happens when we are conscious, but at a moment our thinking freezes and consciousness stills!!...it just happens that we feel peace and happiness (not pleasure!)....with that person or place or item or a life event!!...so, it is an instantaneous act and feeling of the mind...we lose our ego, status, wealth consciousness, power, authority, caste, religion, consequences etc etc and 'fall' in love!!....by the way, i am not referring to our teenagers falling in love here, by the attraction of the body, but referring to the feeling of love in mind and no changes inside or outside the body!!

so, some people sweep our hearts off suddenly like a tornado without our knowledge!!

yes...brain stops thinking after a person falls in love!!!....if you think about a person and the relationship, start asking questions and trying to find out answers or answer them inside the mind, then you can not fall in love!!...i.e you can not through away your ego, bla bla i listed above, free yourself, and do a free fall in love!!!...not possible!!

so...so...so...

1. brain stops thinking about a person and the relationship at the time of falling in love and once we fall in love

2. if we think then we do not fall in love...

3. 'fall' word is not negative but positive of freeing ourselves from all the clutches of the mind, society etc and feeling and breathing freedom...

4. it is not going to cause troubles in practical life as it is not body related...even if it is body related it is not known to others and remains within....and the true feeling of love does not feel possessive and all associated negative thinking, emotions and behaviours...and therefore it does not affect the person being loved...

5. only when it is pure lust then it causes all the negatives and life gets ruined now or later...for both concerned...

peacefully yours...rams...health psychologist...

let us be flexible...not rigid...

Dear all...flexible people always live, love, will be happy, peaceful, can withstand all weathers...but rigid people break...e.g bamboo trees never break in a tornado...they bend, sway and survive...whereas banana trees and other rigid trees break, fall down and die...

so, let us be flexible in our body, mind and behaviours...to sway, withstand all rough weathers of social life and continue to live...

rams

a comment...

I am in 100% agreement with you. However the example offered is not synching with the main message. 
Flexibility in an individual helps him adapt to all situation. For this reason he is able to withstand all weathers. Whether the situation is upbeat or gloomy if an individual remains composed he can outperform. Internally this individual or nation will be very strong. Bamboo appears tall, thin and swaying in wind freely. Internally it is strong - Not only above the ground but also below the ground. In the case of Banana the outer appeance may be bulky and glittering. Internally it is fragile and weak. Many who quit competition are weak in their mind. During heavy wind Banana tree gets uprooted because of the overall weakness. Due to lack of time I stop here.

when we love a person....

Dear all....when we love a person we don't feel like losing ever...we will feel the courage, moral boost etc...we are always happy, peaceful and contented.....but when we 'lust and love', we become possessive, we miss, we feel sad, we long for, we cry, we feel fear of losing, we feel insecure etc...when we feel only lust, we become craving...'veri pudichhufied'...and do all wrongs and crimes...or think 'there are enough beautiful people on earth to lust'....'intha pazham pulikkum!'...and go to another person..... pazham!!

rams

more on love and lust....

dear all...(cut and paste from another post where i entered this, with more value addition of course!!) we have two entities...'body' and 'mind'...

'love' is related to 'mind'..

'lust or like' is related to the body...

'when we 'feel' happy, peaceful, contentment, silence...a divine' feel'ing...moment we think about a person...' there may not be a feeling to see him/her, to be with, to talk to, to possess etc'...this is what is called love...

love is a feeling...it is to do with the mind....nothing to do with the body...

so, we should have more people in our lives whom we love....less people, less love experience....

.now about the other part....i.e body...

if we observe some changes inside or outside (or both) our body when we think or see or be with or talk to a person then it is lust or like...it is not love!!!...

we can never feel contented and peaceful in this relationship...we can never achieve divine state or ultimate of spirituality in this relationship!!!...

it will create craving, possessiveness, jealousy and all related negative thinking, emotions and behaviours...

our life will be totally screwed!!...

Where love is there, lust also can be present, but here too there can never be peace, contentment and silence of the mind...what we will get is spells of pleasure...but we think that is happiness which is not true...

if we have our life based on cravings then we can never be peaceful, happy, healthy, contented and achieve the real success in life...(cravings = things with which we can never feel contented...i.e body needs (water, food, protection for body, sex, physical intimacy) money, wealth, fame, status etc...

if our life is based on needs of five senses (ainthu pulangal) then we can never have peace...we will only have spells of pleasures....

if we base our life on sixth sense...i.e 'life is a process of learning'...'wild and wide reading, experiencing, travelling to 'learn' everything and anything on earth...mostly related to Nature...then we can achieve everything, including all the materialistic things...'life is a study of cause and effect relationships'....

so, if we have even one person with whom we lust or like the, life is going to be a big hell...you can imagine if you have more people in life with whom you lust...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....there are many people who only lust and they feel safe in their mind level, as only their body is involved and there is no relationship perception at the mind level as mind is not involved....there are many people who have both love and lust which screws up the life as 'mind' is also involved here with the perception of a relationship and its related dynamics.....

peacefully yours....rams...health psychologist....

how natures teaches us....????

dear all...there are some moments with Nature, which can't be explained...one has to experience it....that is why after all the experience and thinking and reading i feel Nature is the God!!! (Origin of Nature and Origin of life etc can not be discussed or debated till they are proven as they will be inconclusive...it will only lead to arguments and no usefulness!!...so wise people will not indulge in such arguments!!)...i am sure Natural places, environs etc are beautiful places........can you imagine the sound there?...can you imagine the coolness there?...can you visualise the view all around there?...all the static charges in the body will go off!!

(it is about being there near ...just near....a great falls like a niagara falls)

Does loving some one deeply gives you courage????

my views...we have two entities...'body' and 'mind'...'love' is related to 'mind'...'lust or like' is related to the body...'when we 'feel' happy, peaceful, contentment, silence...a divine' feel'ing...moment we think about a person...' there may not be a feeling to see him/her, to be with, to talk to, to possess etc'...this is what is called love...love is a feeling...it is to do with the mind.....now about the other part....i.e body...if we observe some changes inside or outside (or both) our body when we think or see or be with or talk to a person then it is lust or like...it is not love!!!...we can never feel contented and peaceful in this relationship...we can never achieve divine state or ultimate of spirituality in this relationship!!!...it will create craving, possessiveness, jealousy and all related negative thinking, emotions and behaviours...our life will be totally screwed!!...Where love is there, lust also can be present, but here too there can never be peace, contentment and silence of the mind...what we will get is spells of pleasure...but we think that is happiness which is not true...if we have our life based on cravings then we can never be peaceful, happy, healthy, contented and achieve the real success in life...(cravings = things with which we can never feel contented...i.e body needs (water, food, protection for body, sex, physical intimacy) money, wealth, fame, status etc....if our life is based on needs of five senses (ainthu pulangal) then we can never have peace...we will only have spells of pleasures....if we base our life on sixth sense...i.e 'life is a process of learning'...'wild and wide reading, experiencing, travelling to 'learn' everything and anything on earth...mostly related to Nature...then we can achieve everything, including all the materialistic things...'life is a study of cause and effect relationships'....

which one is good....alone or loneliness???

Dear all...some people say being lonely is good....

being alone is a physical state...feeling lonely is a mental state....

alone is good....lonely is dangerous...

peacefully yours...rams...

some coolers....for eyes.....

dear all...some coolers....

the gift of Nature for us...

Dear all...while you enjoy the view and the beauty of Nature, also did you notice that the young leaves are beautiful than the older ones??...

wofffffffff...other than the human beings, all youngies are beautiful.....luckily Nature has given us the power to be beautiful to get loved through 'behaviours' and also keep us appear less aged than the actuals through exercises, nutritious food and young-minded behaviours / life styles......

peacefully yours...rams....

when do we become matured people about life?....

Dear all...

https://www.facebook.com/Pkesarionline/videos/10151917303374436/



only when we experience emotional, physical, mental and social challenges in life, we grow, evolve, develop, mature, age and become ammazing and incredible human beings beyond imagination...like Gods!!...for this we need to have a strong mind, great support from people around and the blessings of the Nature, which is always there, if only we can feel through our body and mind!!...strong mind is formed through nutritious food and good health enhancing life style!!!

....peacefully yours....rams.....

a question asked...

how long we face challenges in our life.There is no piece of mind.

my reply...

our problem is we think challenges as problems and threats...if we perceive them as learning experience and nothing we are going to lose on this earth then we will not feel sad, tired, scared etc....i agree that it is easy to say but difficult to perceive as the human body and mind looks for their needs and perception of security of all these for entire life....conditioning the mind with spiritual learning about life is the solution....'e.g nothing we brought, nothing we will take, nothing belongs to us, we only have rights to enjoy, everything is there on this earth for us, through love we can conquer all on this earth and we can enjoy as long as we don't destroy it' etc etc...

another important word in life....

Dear all…there are many english words which define the entire life…I had earlier mentioned about one word called PERCEPTION…the basic of peace in life is behind this word PERCEPTION…if we have positive perceptions about people, relationships and life events then we will get positive emotions and positive behaviours which leads to peace, contentment and great physical, mental and social health. Negative perceptions lead to all negatives and destruction. So, PEACE IN LIFE IS INSIDE THE SINGLE WORD CALLED PERCEPTION.

Another word I discussed yesterday was ADAPTABILITY!!....this word is the son of PERCEPTION. Without adaptability we can not find peace and all positives like great relationships, great learning, great life etc.

Another word I want to bring in front of you today is SERVICE. This is another important word which is the daughter of PERCEPTION….some of my thoughts are as follows….

1. All living organisms on this earth live for others. They kill and eat justttt for their survival. Not for pleasure. They indulge in reproductive act also for procreation which is not a conscious act, but a natural instinct. But human beings are the only selfish animals. They exploit and destroy other living organisms for pleasure and indulge in reproductive act, again for pleasure, which is a conscious act. Pleasure drives human beings to crave. So, they can never feel peaceful and contented.

2. Under this scenario PERCEPTION OF SERVICE from other people and living organisms around, only can bring peace and contentment in his life.

3. Also HEALTHY SOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS FOR LONG TIME IN LIFE ARE POSSIBLE ONLY IF HE PERCEIVES ‘SERVICE’ FROM THE ACTS OF OTHERS…AND THROUGH ALL HIS BEHAVIOURS HE FEELS HE IS DOING ‘SERVICE’ TO PEOPLE AND ANIMALS. If this perception is not there, it is impossible for him to be peaceful, contented and to have great relationships.

4. If children feel ‘parents have produced us. It is their duty and responsibility to look after us. Therefore, they are doing all these!’ then they will not love their parents. There will be no peace and contentment. Vice versa is also true. Whereas if they feel what they are doing or being done by the other party is a SERVICE, then love will bloom, relationship will become stronger every day. Peace and contentment will be the back bone of the life and relationship.

5. If students feel ‘teacher is getting salary and therefore he is not doing service but business!’…and if the teacher is also teaching for only salary, then there is no love between the two, no love in the process, it becomes only a business, and there is no peace and contentment. Whereas if both parties feel that teaching process is a SERVICE then there is love amongst them, teaching is done In a better way, relationship remains for life long, students will feel indebted, and there will be peace and contentment for all.

like this we can go on and on...

i have more to type...but no time now...will continue later...

several thoughts...several issues...several words....tsunami my mind all the time...but no time to type...so will type whenever i get time...

bye....peacefully yours...rams...

the eye coolers....

dear all...the water bathed leaves taking sun bath....rams

interested in living as a grass hopper here???

dear all...ready to roll and hopp??....rams

a beautiful view during my morning walks and runs....

dear all...ready to take rest in the forest??...rams

How good relationships are formed?...What is the back bone of success of great life long emotional friendships or love or love marriages or arranged marriages??

Dear all…IMPORTANT POST FOR ALL…just three days back I wrote something about the word SERVICE…I don’t know how many of you read it…but here are some more things about this word most important for life…

1. All living organisms exist on earth for others. i.e in ‘service’ of others.

2. Human beings are also born for the same.

3. To live in peace, some element of perception of SERVICE in our activities is vital.

4. Perception of SERVICE is vital for formation of any lifelong emotional relationship…i.e anything that one does for the other should be perceived as a ‘service’ and ‘sacrifice of their time, energy, life time, love, emotions, feelings, thoughts, wealth, etc’

5. Whether a love or love marriage or arranged marriage or any relationship can survive, be peaceful, exist or live only if one perceives the activities, love, emotional labour etc of the other as service and sacrifice. Otherwise it will only be perceived as ‘duty’ or ‘business’ which cannot lead to a heart to heart everlasting bonding between two people.

6. All those who perceive all the dynamics in organizations or homes as business or duty cannot find peace and happiness in organizations and home.

7. many examples can be given...here is one....If a bank employee feels he is doing service for all customers, he will involve, he will do good job, everyone will praise, he will be known to all, he will be the best employee of the customers, he will be famous, he will be peaceful, he will feel a sense of fulfillment etc. But if he feels he is only going to earn some money for his home living, he is just doing his duty for the money he earns, he cannot be happy, he cannot be peaceful, he cannot perform to the satisfaction of his customers AND ANY ONE WHO IS NOT PERCEIVING ENERGY, HAPPINESS, HEALTH, PEACE, CONTENTMENT AT OFFICE CAN NOT FIND ALL THESE AT HOME!!!

8. If a husband/wife perceives his wife/husband or lover as ‘a gift of Nature’ and perceives all that they do as service and sacrifice then love will bloom between them, it will get strengthened every moment, it will remain strong forever…else it will break…

9. Where perception of service is there, love is sure to emerge…e.g people fall in love with teachers, preachers, spiritual leaders, nurses (not referring to the ladies…I am referring to their service…nurse could be a man too! (e.g red cross home nurses)), receptionists etc.

10. If you don’t want to fall in love with a person, don’t perceive their activities as service…perceive as duty and business…you will not fall in love with them…if you are attracted towards them then it is lust and like…not love…

more later...bye...enjoy the week end...and festival days...

peacefully yours...rams...health psychologist...

What is the single most important word in rearing the children?

Dear all...IMPORTANT FOR PARENTS AND STUDENTS...

What is the first and the foremost thing that we have to teach our children?

ADAPTABILITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!….this is the first and foremost thing that we have to teach our children!!!

Are we teaching them?

Can they eat any food, any preparation that is available?

...can they live without their parents or siblings or close friends or relatives?

...can they make their new friends at their place of living easily and quickly?

...can they live in a room/house and amidst people of all type of languages, caste, religion, region, race, intelligence, interests, skills, culture, belief systems, value systems, social rules and regulations, laws of the land (legal systems)?

...can they live in any climate?...can the live in any environment?

...can they live without anything that they like?

...can they live without even the basic items like clean and nutritious food, clean water, clean air, protective clothing, electric supply, gas, till they get these?

...can he live with people of any type of personality traits?...can he live without money?...can he earn his own money?...can he travel to any part of the world alone and live there?...can he meet any person of any language at any part of earth and converse and live with him/her?

This is the need of the hour!!...Children with such capabilities only can survive in the years to come!!...

“Regional Children” may be able to exist or survive…but they may not be able to live with peace, good health and contentment!!!...only “Global Children” with above capabilities can live on this earth…

Why did we give birth to children?...for our time pass, enjoyment, fun in giving birth and rearing them?...for staying with us and looking after us during old age?....if the answer is YES, then all animals are better than us and they seem to be knowing about how to rear offsprings.

So, let us stop putting them only in boys schools or girls schools or schools of a particular religion or caste or region or language or medium of instruction. Let us stop telling them to read only a particular language or be friends with people of a particular language or caste or religion.

What is happening now?...

parents give love and affection for the happiness and pleasure they get while giving that to children...especially these mothers!!!...are they bothered about their employability, livability, co-existability??? (hihihi...don't bother about perfect grammer etc...this is e era english!!)

Many students are not able to remain away from parents, siblings, relatives, make their own food, wash their own clothes, adapt to people from other regions, religions, caste, food, climate etc..

They fail in exams…low attendance…leave schools, colleges and jobs…commit suicide…land up in doing crimes…They divorce and break marriages…break friendships, leave relatives etc…low adaptability…low resilience…low self-concept…big failures in life inspite of having big wealth or intelligence or family or social support etc…

Right from childhood we run around, take all pains and get admission, spend sleepless nights to educate them well, loose our peace-happiness and health for their education, do lots of sacrifice in our life for them, send them by private vehicle etc so that they don’t get tired and lose time, and finally the student also gets 200 out of 200 in all subjects…becomes topper and what not…but finally due to lack of ADAPTABILITY and related issues he fails to live a college, organizational, family, social and personal life!!!

Therefore, let us…

1. Tell them to get proficiency in reading, writing and speaking of as many global languages as possible…some are English, Spanish, Chinese, Japanese, French, german…

2. Admit them in schools were children of all types of religion, region, caste, cultures, languages, countries, sexes are studying.

3. Let them go around the country and world for ‘learning’ of cultures, value systems etc by living with people of different origins. Admit them in schools which do these.

4. Let them get exposed to all sorts of works for few days like agriculture, skill related works like carpentry, smithy, etc,

5. Let them learn all sorts of art forms

6. Let them make their own food, wash their own clothes, clean their own things which they made them dirty (e.g room, utensils etc)

7. Let them read holy books of all religions

8. Subject them to live in all types of landscapes like, islands, forests, deserts, hills, mountains, pleatue, plains, sea, extreme climate conditions (high cold, high temperatures, high humidity, heavy rains) etc for few days with minimal support and maximum of their own efforts

9. Let them do social service by teaching other children, poor students, orphans, weak students…help patients in hospitals…help aged people in old age homes…help animals in farms…

10. Making them to understand that CHANGE is the only thing that does not change with people, organisations, way of living, cultures etc. Adapting to changes quickly is the solution for successful, peaceful and a contented living. THERE IS NOTHING WHICH DOES NOT CHANGE ON EARTH. They need to understand this and learn adapting.

11. There are many such things…but even if we do a part of these I think it should suffice…

All these will not only make them adaptable but also increase their emotional and spiritual intelligence…

1. They will be able to take decisions in any life situation

2. They will be able to live happily and healthily with contentment and success with any one and at any place.

3. They will be responsible children for their parents

4. They will know value of time, help, energy, life, living, food, water, air, money, wealth, people, relationships, love and affection, teacher, schools, colleges, parents, siblings, friends....wofffffff...still more...

5. They will not only become best in their home, organizations, society and also become noble and best human beings.

6. They will live happily, with great physical-mental-social wellbeing, with contentment, with peace and of course, success will come and fall on their feet.

7. This is what I call as Nature is the God, and it teaches all lessons of life and living

8. They will be able to decide their destiny, and that decision will be better than what their parents can take for them.

9. There will be no problems in their married life, because they know how to adapt to people and situations and the value of what and whom they have in their life.

10. Their children will become the best human beings as they know how to rear children

11. Their resilience, self concept, self esteem, self confidence etc etc will all be high

12. They will have a rock strong and flexible mind, will make good families, society and country.

Last, but not the least, CHILDREN DO NOT LISTEN, THEY OBSERVE AND FOLLOW PARENTS!!!...SO LET US WALK AND SHOW THE WAY FOR THEM

So, the crux of this post is MAKING CHILDREN ‘ADAPTABLE’ IS WHAT IS CALLED REARING!!!...

more such posts will follow…

peacefully yours...rams...