Why are we depressed, sad, frustrated, angry, anxiety struck, dull for no reasons?

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

Why people are frustrated for no reason?...

Why people get angry without any reasons?...

Why people feel sad due to reasons unknown?...

Why people answer 'Life is just going on yaar!' when we ask them 'How are you boss?'

Why do we feel dull even after having everything as per social standards and norms?

Why people are anxiety struck, busy and feel worried when they don't know why they are like that?

There can be several reasons. Many of those reasons are due to the suppressed ambitions, goals, desires, dreams, passions etc.

Nature has given lots of capacity....

....to read (knowledge acquiring in multiple fields),

....to know (vast variety of information acquiring through multiple sources),

....for skill development (in multiple areas of specialisation),

....for competency improvement in each skill,

....for undergoing the experience (putting all the knowledge and skill to use and gain experience in multiple domains)

....to learn (resilience and behaviour changes through experience)

Nature has given us variety of several hundreds of personality traits (nearly 640) which are positive, negative and neutral.

Nature has given us intelligence, creativity etc.

Like this Nature has given a universe of things inside us!

When all these are put to optimum use by us in our life and living then it is the ideal condition, which can probably never happen to any one. But we should strive to reach some where closer to this. Else the gaps or deficiencies in usage can remain as a silent stressor, in the subconscious mind, as these are Nature driven natural stimuli from within us to put to use, excel and get a FEELING ACCEPTANCE THROUGH APPRECIATION, REWARDS, AWARDS, REMUNERATION ETC. So, if we don't use them to optimal level, one or few, then it can have anywhere from negligent effect to mild effect to learned helplessness state to depression to suicides. So, the seriousness may be less or more, but it will always be there!

So, human beings can not be healthy, happy and peaceful without putting the mental, physical and social aptitudes to optimal use!!

One can not be idle and be physically, mentally and socially healthy too!!

In olden days when oppurtunities did not exist, especially for women, they suffered a lot due to this reason. And men too suffered due to the 'behaviours of unknown reason' of women.

So, every human being has to liberate themselves to escape from this!!

There is no escape from facing challenges, growing, evolving, exposing, learning, reading, knowing, experiencing, involving in skill developmental activities, using all the positive personality attributes, maturing in them etc.

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

Why some one is rich inspite of being a bad person, and why some one is poor inspite of being a good person. Why a bad person gets a good wife and a good person gets a bad wife? Why relationships are suffering?

Dear all…ONE QUESTION AND ONE ANSWER…

Qn. Why some one is rich inspite of being a bad person, and why some one is poor inspite of being a good person. Why a bad person gets a good wife and a good person gets a bad wife? Why relationships are suffering?

Ans: Anyone can give many answers for these questions. No one can prove any answer to be right or wrong. There is no scientific proof. If we discuss such issues with others with a closed mind or fixed belief then it can lead to only ego centered argument with no positive end result. If we discuss with an open mind to analyse and accept the answer that gives us good health, peace, happiness and other positives then it is good.

All of us and various societies have a yardstick of measurement…quality standards of life and living to be good, bad…we measure rich and poor by money and wealth, beautiful and not beautiful by external appearance...But Nature has different method and yardstick of measurement…We may think that yardstick as 'how much a person is peaceful, happy or physically, mentally, socially healthy, contented, fulfilled, matured, grown, evolved etc towards becoming an ideal and noble human being somewhere near equivalent to god or becoming a true deciple of god'.

If one is good, only good will happen to that person, only thing is, that...(1) He or she should know the definition of a true, ideal and noble human being and should know whether he or she is one of that Nature, where does he or she stand in the continuum between good, bad and neutral ...(2) So the person should know that whatever happens is only good for that person to grow...mature...expand...evolve...

We will not get what we want...we will only get what we deserve!!

What we deserve is whatever is required for us to become an ideal human being!!

Relationships are suffering because our ‘immediate’ ancestors believed that ‘dependency between people for needs and wants only can keep a relationship forming, growing and sustaining’. But under these circumstances only fights, frustration, anger and sadness and distancing only will occur when needs, wants and expectations are not fulfilled….but our ancestors felt that ‘this is life…this is how it is!’ because they felt that after some time when the needs, wants and expectations are fulfilled then these negatives will go. So, the believed that both positives and negatives are part of relationships, life and living.

And many psychology counsellors born in this same culture feel it is right and talk the same thing 😰

But independence and total freedom brings out the true love in them for the other person!!

A culture of dependency, slavery, ruling, demanding, Division of Labour will only bring agony...pain...fights...sadness...bleeding of hearts!!!...A failed relationship and family system!!😰

When one loves the other truly, he or she will not keep quiet seeing the lover suffering. Then automatically compromises and sacrifices arise...caring and supporting arise...not when demanded and ruled...through rules and regulations!!...Love can't be demanded....It has to spring from within on it's own.

Here i am not referring to the words,feeling and behaviours of caring and supporting that arises when one is aroused for pleasures from the other. i am referring to THAT ARISES WHEN ONE IS NOT AROUSED FOR NEEDS AND WANTS!!...When it arises out of human being or humaness in a person when no rules, regulations and expectations are there!!

Peacefully yours…Rams…Psychologist!!

How to tackle and change the parents and grand parents and how to manage the dynamics at home?

Dear all…THIS IS FOR ALL…HOW TO HANDLE THE PARENTS AND GRAND-PARENTS AT HOME?

In a system where we have a dependent variable that is dependent on many other variables, change of one will have its impact on all other variables.

Any system where two or more human beings interact with definite roles and responsibilities in an organized manner becomes a social system. And the elements, i.e human beings are of different characteristics, origin, development history etc. Therefore, marriage, family, all the love affairs involving body etc become social systems.

During olden days following were not there:-

1) Oppurtunity for basic and higher education
2) Global education and working
3) Job oppurtunities
4) Oppurtunity for global socialization
5) Oppurtunity to pursue varieties of professions
6) Oppurtunity for skill development in varieties of skills and competency levels improvement in skills to global standards
7) Oppurtunity for global travel and that too instant travel possibility
8) Oppurtunity of cheap and instant communication
9) Oppurtunity of global entertainment, education, work and entire living and life on palmtop.
10) Easy affordability of all the above

We can list many like this!

All these have changed the way we live…AND THEREFORE, THESE HAVE CHANGED THE DEFINITION OF RELATIONSHIPS, MARRIAGE, FAMILY, SOCIETIES, ORGANISATIONS, ROLES, STATUSES AND RESPONSIBILITIES of every one IN THESE SOCIAL SYSTEMS.

All these therefore, have changed the beliefs and definitions we had in the past about girls, boys, man, woman, husband, wife, siblings etc, their capabilities, their characteristics, their likes, dislikes, interests, freedom, personal space, their social envelope, their strengths and weaknesses and the entire social dynamics between all these people.

We need to understand and accept all these!!

If someone decides not to change, then they can’t be part of any of these social systems anymore without damage to peace, happiness, physical-mental and social well-being. 

Therefore, we need to change…redefine all the above in accordance with the changes…in way they are health enhancing!

These kind of changes always existed, but only thing is now it is happening rapidly and adaptation is a challenge and requires conscious efforts and skills. The old people at home, relatives’ circles and society may not know this or may not be able to change, they may not have required skill sets and also at this pace. We need to explain all these and keep them stable and confident, as the best Change Agents!!

All the best!!

Peacefully yours…Rams…Psychologist!!

Dear all...today is Christmas day...the birth day of Jesus Christ, the person who saw people killing each other for greed, and not survival need, and told them to be united, loving, caring for all living organisms and defined the meaning of life and living!!...so, the true spirit of celebrating this day, the true way of respecting the Jesus is to 'LOVE ALL', the way Mother Teresa did and make them feel 'I care for you!...i am there with you, don't worry!!'. When this is done, the Jesus is there WITH YOU, IN you, AROUND you all the time. Otherwise we will only have symbols of identity for selfishness and the Jesus will not be there with us!!

So, on this auspicious day i wish all a great, happy, memorable day and a life full of peace, prosperity, health, happiness and self actualization to you, your family, relatives, friends and all around.

peacefully yours...rams...

THIS IS FOR ALL PARENTS AND STUDENTS...ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO WANT TO BECOME ACHIEVERS...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL PARENTS AND STUDENTS...ESPECIALLY THOSE WHO WANT TO BECOME ACHIEVERS...

Parents push the children for studies and professions that are lucrative...much against the interest, skill sets and passions of the children!!

Some children adapt...some children get burnt and just survive-off in their life...some do not even clear the course and leave, get depressed etc...!!

Especially those with very high intelligence, if they are not mentored and guided as per their interest, skills and passion, become depressed and it can lead to any eventuality.

One of my MIT classmate, a giant in maths, IIT Select, died in depression over many years, as he was not in the right direction and pushed into conventional life and living!!

Many believe that INTELLIGENCE is a must to be an achiever. But none less than Einstein says 'Genius is 1% intelligence and 99% HARDWORK'!!

If we take a subject and profession which we don't like, then it will be stressful and we will not be able to put in the hard work. Whereas if we choose the one we like, then we can lose ourselves in that, enjoy, forget the world around and produce world class achievements!!

Doing research and publishing them as papers in the best of the journals in the world is a way to be a global achiever, attract the attention of the giants in that field, getting oppurtunities to study and work at the best of the institutions of world repute, gaining recognition and contributing to the humanity!!

I am convinced about what Einstein said when i see it happening around me!!

My blood-sister's son, who has just an average intelligence, who scored just about 156 cut off in Engg in Tamil Nadu Matriculation Board, interested in Biology, when supported, mentored and guided by his parents in his subject of interest, has lost himself in his research, has come out with wonderful research publications and is in the right path of becoming an icon in his field of interest!!

He is a 28 year old, BTech Bio-Informatics (2007-11) from Tamil Nadu Agricultural University, Coimbatore, student who dedicated his life for research thereafter to solve the miseries of human beings...i.e aging, death and diseases!!..He worked as Research Assistant at IISc, Blore, till 2016, published 17 international journal papers of repute till 2016, and is presently doing PhD at the University of Newcastle, UK.

https://www.google.co.in/search?q=gurusaran+manickam&oq=gurusaran+manickam&aqs=chrome..69i57j69i60.3547j0j7&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

The above link shows list of his publications. The recent publication of his tail piece research in Nature Communications, with Impact Factor - 12.353 shows that he is growing up in the right path towards becoming genius!!...The link is below...

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-018-07794-7

Hats off to his parents who have taken up the decision to support his zeal and enthusiasm, much against the cultural way of sending for a lucrative engg subject, making him work in an MNC, getting him married off to a wealthy family and counting the chickens!!

Therefore, the crux is...

1. More than intelligence, hardwork is a MUST to be an achiever.

2. If we study and work in the subject of our interest, then it will not be hard work, it will be just fun and enjoyment. It is all about trying to be inquisitive to know the unknown!...Being creative to produce the future life...future living...future world...future technologies...future science...future engineering...future inventions...future discoveries!!

3. More than the above two, global adaptability for food, cultures, climate, language, ability to make new friendships for emotional support are important. If you analyse the life of famous scientists of India like Srinivasa Ramanujam etc, they suffered a lot or died at young age due to diseases of non-adaptability to new global climates and cultures.

4. For average students it might take little more time to make big achievements, but it is ok, as reaching Everest is what is more important. No one lives here till 100 and no one takes all the wealth he made, no one can enjoy all his wealth keeping up good health. So, it is never late!!...Being peaceful, happy, healthy, contented, fulfilled, self actualised, self transcended, defining our own life are the priorities in life, rather than being a traditional and conventional one!

5. Parents should support, mentor and guide their children by themselves or through experts, and if the children are focused and are able to lose themselves in their passion then they are sure to excel and become icons in their fields of interest!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

Tomorrow is Christmas...A special day of celebration and cheers for the entire world and humanity!!

In fact every day is, and contains something special for Hindus!!

Apart from Religions, every day now has been made a special day by UN and the world community to make people to UNITE and CELEBRATE TOGETHER...that will make everyone to forget the differences and live together as the best friends!!

So, festivals are to UNITE and to spread care and support indiscriminately to everyone worldwide!

The prophets are too simple people. They saw all rich and poor people complicating their lives. They saw everyone fighting, crying, feeling sad, killing each other and told them about how to live the life...and what is life...They explained how peace, happiness and mental, physical and social well-being matter in our life than anything else!!...They created a belief system aligned with Nature. They explained how these are important compared to those the people believed in to be important in life and living, vital, the essential crux and their birthright..i.e ego, complexes etc

But the rulers who are complicated, ruthless, who do not want people to be united, live peacefully and happily (because then professions related to these domains of life will perish and economic, scientific and technology development will not take place and they can not rule!!) divided the people on Religions, Caste, Language etc. to make them fight and kill each other.

If we know how to live, what is life, if we can become ideal and the best human beings then why do we need any religion and things related to it!...Shunt them away!!

Why to name a lifestyle or living as a Religion or caste and differentiate it to get obsessed, possessive, get aggressive with hate, and dislike each other?

In the process of politicizing by rulers, the LIFE STYLE SUGGESTED BY THE PROPHETS lost their basic and fundamental purpose for which they were created...to unite...to be peaceful...to be happy...to be harmonious...to be healthy!!

So, let us invite the people of other religions to come to our homes and at other social and religious places to make them make them participate, to feel respected and honoured, to feel peaceful, happy and elated, to make them united, to make them celebrate the occasion, understand and appreciate the beauty, divine and holiness of our lifestyle and follow them in their lives too!

Let us have the identity of good and noble human beings then only our religion will get its meaning, respect and divine status to be followed by everyone!

If we are not good human beings, and follow our religion religiously, then it has no meaning, does not serve any purpose to us to live this unique, single oppurtunity to live, make people not to follow our life style etc.

So, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all to be united, care and support each other as Human beings, rather than being religious about it!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

We are losing out of the Gems every moment!!

🌹🌹...Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

There are hundreds of TV channels and soo many social media and memes...All of them talk about soooo much about philosophies of life...living...relationships...!!!

We laugh out our stomach by watching and reading all these. But our life and living never changes. We remain wherever we were before watching!...we continue to cry and suffer when we stop laughing...Why?

For us everything is entertainment and not something serious to learn!!

Of course, we should not be serious bugs and should not lose out the fun value of TV programmes or beauty of memes!!...But at the same time should not lose out on the permanent gift and asset of watching the programme or reading the meme...i.e lesson to learn to perfect and architect ourselves as an ideal human being in the journey of life towards being noble!

So, from this new year...

1. Let us clap, laugh, dance and enjoy the Tv programmes or memes etc.

2. After the enjoyment, let us think about the life changing phrases or words or sentences or gestures or stories of these and follow in life too...Else we will be the biggest losers of best of the oppurtunities to carve ourselves into beautiful sculptures!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!🌹🌹🌹

THIS IS FOR ALL PARENTS, HUSBANDS AND WIVES...OF PRESENT AND FUTURE

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL PARENTS, HUSBANDS AND WIVES...OF PRESENT AND FUTURE!!

All husbands are cribbing about their wives that 'SHE IS NOT UPTO MY EXPECTATIONS!'. All wives also are not satisfied with their husbands! Parents are not satisfied with their children. Children are not satisfied with their parents, but being the weakest in amongst all these people, they only burn inside themselves, grow and leave the parents with scars and developmental irregularities.

All social networks and media are full of jokes, videos, interviews, speeches, debates etc criticising the women (as most of the memes and short videos are made by men) and some women criticising men.

Men, in general say that women are impossible to manage and unpredictable to handle. Women in general say that he is incapable to be a husband or father or friend etc to their satisfaction.

Every counselling is filled with only these. Men say they are suffering because of the women and women say they are suffering because of the men and children say that they are suffering because of both. Wife says she is working like a donkey whole day for the man and the children, the man says he is working like a dog whole day for his wife and children and children say they are living for their parents...But finally no one is happy and peaceful and i don't know who is living for whom and for what??

When you talk to them individually, each one of them is a Gem. Excellent human beings, but separately and isolatedly, not as a family or group. When one relates to the other then there are issues.

This holds good between friends, communities, villages, towns, societies, states and nations.

If we ask what is the basic reason for all this suffering then it clearly emerges out that...

THEY ALL EXPECT A SET OF BEHAVIOURS FROM THE OTHER PERSON BEFITTING THEIR SOCIAL STATUS, ROLES AND RESPONSIBILITIES, THE RELATIONSHIP THEY HAVE WITH THE OTHER PERSON. Where is the problem in this if this person explains the expectations to the other person and the other person lives up to the expectations of his or her beloved?...No problem at all!!...Lack of communication therefore is an issue. Some ironing out happens and life and relationship improves, but not completely. If the person does not change in the areas of importance and priority of the other person, then dissatisfaction broods, cold war commences without sufficient and with improper communication, and one day blasts of irrepairably into a volcano of divorce or break-up, making children to suffer to develop with deficiencies and suffer throughout life in their relationships.

Where is the problem?...Where is the crux?

the issues are...

1. A boy or an adult man or old man are supposed to behave, display knowledge, wisdom, maturity, intelligence, skills, personality traits commensurate with their gender and age...but truly every one is not able to display to the expectation of others. They are not supposed to do, behave, think, show feelings in certain ways. e.g If a boy cries, he is ridiculed that he should not cry like a girl. So, he is unable to show or stress out his feelings and suffers. This is just one e.g

2. Same goes with a girl too. In fact more expectations as a daughter, wife, daughter-in-law, sister-in-Law, sister with requirement to display dos and don'ts of each of these at the same time which are contradicting to each other. In fact the don't list is bigger than the dos. Also she is not supposed to do things like boys...e.g driving a bullet bike, laughing louder, showing interest for mountaineering or hard and risky jobs/activities/adventures etc.

3. We have made out a set of beliefs that a girl or a boy should be like this, a wife or a husband should be like this, a brother or sister should be like this, a daughter/son-in-law or sister/brother-in-law should be like this etc...WHICH IS UNNATURAL!!!!! BECAUSE NATURE HAS NOT CREATED THE RELATIONSHIPS, ROLES, STATUSES AND RESPONSIBILITIES. ANYTHING UNNATURAL IS STRESSFUL. EVERY ONE CAN CHANGE AGAINST THEIR NATURAL SELF ONLY TO SOME EXTENT WITH MILD STRESSES. EVERY ONE WILL BREAK OR SUFFER BEYOND THEIR LIMITS. Why like this?

All of us are perfect to ourselves but imperfect to others and everyone appears to be imperfect to our eyes!!

All of us are born to different parents, different heredity, different levels of intelligence, memory skills, other skill sets, competency levels in each skill, understanding, perceptions, grow with different life experiences, different learning experiences, different beliefs depending upon their learning experiences, no one is perfect and every one is bron and grown with some physical-mental and social disabilities (mild or severe, noticeable or unnoticeable, of different health compromising levels, personality traits, strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes, interests and disinterests, beliefs and disbelief, acceptable and unacceptable, convictions and doubts.

1. We have to understand these differences and accept each other as they are with their defects.

2. There are few differences in males and females due to their gender difference and related differences in the body systems, the way they function, the way they grow and mature, accordingly their thoughts, feelings, tandrums etc which we have to understand and accept. e.g every moment the thought processes, feelings and behaviours of females change due to frequent and fast changes in the hormonal and neurotransmitter secretion states even in a day, day and night, changes in the social situation etc. This men have to understand and accept.

3. Other than the above, Nature does not see any difference in female and male. Therefore, we need to forget about what society says or culture says or clan says or religion says or caste-sect says etc.SO, THERE IS NOTHING KNOWN AS 'MALE BEHAVIOUR' OR 'FEMALE BEHAVIOUR'!!...DON'T CLASSIFY AND EXPECT BEHAVIOURS FOR DIFFERENT GENDERS AND DIFFERENT MAN CREATED SOCIAL ROLES AND STATUSES. THERE IS NOTHING KNOWN AS HUSBAND BEHAVIOUR, WIFE BEHAVIOUR, SIBLING BEHAVIOUR, LOVER BEHAVIOUR ETC. IF YOU RESPECT AND ACCEPT EACH ONE WITH THEIR NATURAL BEHAVIOURS, YOU WILL, IN GENERAL FIND, RESPONSIBLE BEHAVIORS FROM THE OTHER PERSON. ONLY WHEN YOU DEMAND AND RULE THE ISSUE COMES. ACCEPT EACH OTHER'S LIMITATIONS IN YIELDING OR ADAPTING OR CHANGING.

Therefore, the crux is...

1. Don't classify the behaviours of your daughters and sons. Girls might show some boy behaviours or thoughts or feelings and vice versa. Due to this their aspirations, dreams, passions, jobs / careers, their education they choose, their hobbies can be different and might overlap with opposite gender. Accept it. Don't force them to change. support and encourage them. ALLOW THEM TO BE WHO THEY ARE AND WHAT THEY ARE NATURALLY. ONLY THING TO BE LOOKED INTO IN THIS IS 'WHETHER IT IS HEALTH ENHANCING OR HEALTH COMPROMISING...IN ALL DOMAINS OF PHYSICAL, MENTAL AND SOCIAL WELL-BEING...THAT IS ALL!!....DON'T THRUST OR DUMP YOUR WRONG SOCIAL LEARNING CONCEPTS AND BELIEFS, DUE TO WHICH YOU ARE SUFFERING, AND DON'T MAKE THEM ALSO TO SUFFER AND SCREW UP / MESS UP THEIR LIVES.

2. The same thing goes with behaviours of wife, husband, sibling etc too. ALLOW THEM TO BE IN THEIR NATURAL SELVES. THERE IS NOTHING KNOWN AS DIVISION OF LABOUR AT HOME. THERE IS NOTHING KNOWN AS DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES WITH RESPECT TO EACH OTHER, OTHER THAN HUMANNESS. THERE IS NOTHING KNOWN AS DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES OTHER THAN MENTORING AND GROOMING THE CHILDREN AS CONFIDENT, ADAPTABLE, IDEAL GOOD HUMAN BEINGS.

IF WE UNDERSTAND THE ABOVE THEN RELATIONSHIPS ARE DIVINE AND HOMES ARE HEAVEN!!

Peacefully yours...Rams....Psychologist!!

Mood out...not feeling ok...feeling depressed...!

Dear all…THIS IS FOR ALL…

Every human being undergoes mild or severe depression in life occasionally more than once.

How to handle it ourselves?

How to help a person who is unable to handle it himself or herself?

How to save a person who is about to suicide?

It is the clinical condition of the brain wherein the neurotransmitters secretion is less. It could be due to several host of reasons from poor nutrition to ill-health/ diseases or social reasons.

In today’s world of stress for recognition for knowledge, skills, personality traits (including appearance), experience, wisdom, emotional support, friendships, love (emotions/feelings) and affection, care and supporting behaviours etc people generally feel depressed due to a sense of FEELING OF REJECTION.

The poor clinical condition of the brain causes the mind to sense a FEELING OF REJECTION or this feeling of rejection can cause the poor clinical condition. Depending upon the level or seriousness of rejection, the damage condition is more or less and vice versa.

The following attempts could be made to revive such people (this could be done by the affected individuals themselves…if not, they can seek the help of experts who could be even friends and relatives). All these instantly shower the neurotransmitters, changes the clinical condition of the brain and improves the moods and interests:-

(i) Take 20 long and deep breathes in clean, open air and pleasant environment and climate. This sets the stage for the brain with enough positive changes in the secretion status. This should be the first activity. If this is done, then mood sets in to come out of the depression.

(ii) Now, just hug and kiss the item or person in reality (behaviour) or fantasies (cognitive) with a feeling of the relationship and belongingness. Continue doing it till such time enough secretion is created in the brain and you sense a feeling of goodness, ecstasy and divine. All mothers do this and feel contented, fulfilled and give to other family members too. So, if someone can strike a Motherly love relationship with any living or non-living in reality or fantasies then this technique can be used.

(iii) Go out in the open. Don’t remain in the closed space. The open space can be filled with living or non-living i.e a social condition of people filled with known or unknown…or just Nature. Don’t be alone. Feeling of loneliness is due to non-availability of love and affection from a specific person or group (e.g family) or organisation. Striking a relationship with an item or place which can connect up with the person or group can help to come out of the feeling of rejection.

(iv) Follow up the above with a group game, with sitting or involving running or moving around.

(v) Innocence is beautiful. Innocence is cute. Innocence is divine. Anyone and everyone can strike a relationship with innocence naturally because it secretes the neurotransmitters instantly and abundantly. All animals are innocent. All babies are innocent …whether human or animal or plants. All plant life can be perceived to be innocent and one can strike a relationship with them, especially if they are the creation of the individual. So, give a cute baby or dog or kitten to the depressed person. The animal or baby can exhibit innocent cute behaviours that can make the person sense a feeling of relationship…acceptance…which showers the neurotransmitters in the brain and improves the physical and mental condition…then the person starts feeling the emotions…happiness…tears…then the barrier is broken in the heart…the person feels better and gets ready to live a normal life….comes out of the depression. So, growing pets or plants or aquarium, even keeping the photographs of god, friends or pets or plants or Nature with whom relationships can be perceived or feelings can be shared in reality or fantasies helps. The moving animals go the depressed person and create the relationship. So they are the best. Non-moving items like photos, memories etc comes the next because the affected person has to make efforts to strike the relationship or recollect the memories etc. To make the efforts and bring-in the moods, and change the brain conditions, the breathing exercise and other techniques explained above helps.

(vi) Reality is perfect. Fantasy helps to come out and connect with the reality.

So, the crux is…

1. Grow pets at home. Grow potted plants. Grow gardens. Keep windows opened, let the Nature come inside…i.e breeze, light, morning sun rays, music of Nature…all these are good mood boosters.

2. Fill the bedroom (where we get up with depression…or go to when we feel depressed) with the reality or models or pics or memory of things with whom you can strike a relationship. But then don’t keep living in this fantasy always. Move to reality to connect up. Play group games. Mingle with like-minded and interested people.

3. Keep the music of choice at that moment surrounding you all the time. Let the Natural Fragrance (not artificial, chemical created) that fits your moods surround you always.

4. Take bath in cold water when you want to be fresh, when you feel depressed. It showers the positive chemicals in brain. Warm water brings dullness, sleepy moods. It has arousing property also.

So, don’t feel depressed. Don’t feel the sense of rejection. Don’t allow anyone to feel all these!!

Helping to live our body and mind…helping others to live confidently without depression itself is a great help…godly help…this does not require any money…it just requires the feelings and human attitude!!

Peacefully yours…Rams…Psychologist!!