THIS IS FOR ALL YOUNGSTERS....

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL YOUNGSTERS...

It pains me when i see people dying of heart attack!!...Specially leaving behind their wife who came behind them in life thinking that he will be there with her for entire life!!...Leaving behind the children small and young, on the roads, high and dry!!...Saddddddd!!

If you find some one who is more than about 40 years of age, whom you love a lot and not want them to die, just pick them up, put them inside or on a vehicle, take them to a hospital once in a year, get the Lipid Profile and Blood Fasting and PP checks done. If corrective measures are taken, they can not die of heart attack!!...The blood vessels of the heart do not get clogged over night. It is long term processes. So, finding out early helps.

But they may not be willing and may not cooperate with you!!

They will say...

"Death is not in our hands!...It is karma effect!!"

"God is there with me!...Nothing can happen to me!!"

"I will go only when my time comes, not when the doctors say!!"

Like this they will give thousand reasons...

But just lift them and get this done!!

Otherwise you might regret later!!

Peacefully yours....rams....!!

'If you live like your parents, you will only become that or less than that!!...If you want to achieve more than your parents, then you have to live differently!!'

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL PARENTS AND CHILDREN...

Every parent has a definition of life and living. Purpose of life. Who we are etc. They have a definition of working culture, what is good, not good, what is right, not right, what is correct and incorrect etc.

With these definitions, knowledge and wisdom they have achieved what ever they have achieved ...with respect to peace, happiness, good physical health, mental health, contentment in life, fulfillment in life, social well-being, fame, power/authority, organisational and social status, image or identity etc. Whatever they achieved may be an exceptional thing and outstanding thing for them.

If we follow their definitions and food steps we will either achieve the same or little less than that.

If they lived with out any peace, if they received many life style diseases, if they only developed hate from others, if they only made a small wealth (in our perception), if they achieved fame or authority only in their relatives circles, if they lived with all those divisive sensitivities of religion, caste etc, then you are also most likely get the same in your life...if you keep the same definitions of life listed above.

If your parents are hybrid, then most likely you are likely to be much better than both of them with respect to intelligence, skills and various other mental faculties and traits.

So, you are better equipped by nature to grow much greater levels than your parents in all the domains of professional, personal, social, organisational and family life listed above.

Therefore, the crux is....

'If you live like your parents, you will only become that or less than that!!...If you want to achieve more than your parents, then you have to live differently. All your definitions about everything in life has to be different than theirs which includes about eating, health, marriage, entertainment, family, relationships etc.

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS WHO WANT TO BECOME DESIGN ENGINEERS AND SCIENTISTS BUT UNABLE TO....

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS WHO WANT TO BECOME DESIGN ENGINEERS AND SCIENTISTS BUT UNABLE TO....

You have a problem!! (It could be even a family issue or relationship issue too!!😂)

The problematic issue may involve a transmitter, a receiver and an environment or medium. Or a process. Or reactants. Or a discomfort. Whatever it may be, list down the variables (factors) and constants. List down the causes and effects of the variables. Separate the variables into dependent and independent variables. Decide which all variables you want to measure and their ranges. Carry out a survey of sensors or transducers available. Decide the sensors required.

Next comes selection of transmission medium. Depending upon the output of the transducer, decide whether it is wires, or RF cables or optical fibers or any other transmission medium. You will have work out the related parameters.

Now you list down the processing methods possible. Sensor fusion techniques etc.

Next is the suitable display method or actuating mechanism.

Any problem appears difficult, complicated and impossible. But they all contain some small steps and elements. Once we list down them and deal issue by issue we will find the way, clarity, and the path will be clearly visible.

Most of the issues require only three...1. sensors...2. processors...3. actuators or displays....whether it is a measurement system or control system.

Some of the problems also deal with selection of materials and processes.

Anything is possible if we are determined, dedicated and ready to get lost in the act till we reach the goal!!

People will laugh at you when you define the problem or when you say you are determined to find a solution.

But several great discoveries or inventions have come out of only crazy ideas, thoughts and creative/out of box thinking and observing the Nature, the variables in it and their inter-dependencies.

150 years before, did any one think that a machine like aeroplane will fly. Rockets will go to space or objects will go to interstellar objects/space/places?...They would have laughed saying "Anything thrown up has to fall down, that is Nature's law!!..Birds are naturally meant for flying, but not other objects!"

But this has become possible by observing a simple common phenomenon which you see in canals in villages...I.e in a canal when the water flows to paddy fields, where there is narrow path, the water flows at greater velocity. All of us have played by sending paper boats or flowers or leaves or a paper and observing it going fast at the narrow path and again becoming slow after it leaves that narrow path. Can you believe that this is the basis of an aeroplane flying??

So, solutions for many issues are hidden inside Nature...whether it is related to mind or relationship or philosophy of living or scientific inventions and discoveries!!

All the best!!

Peacefully yours...Rams!!

THIS IS FOR ALL THOSE WHO KEEP ARGUING WITH PEOPLE AND FEEL FRUSTRATED THAT NO ONE UNDERSTAND OR FEELS THEIR FAITHS AND BELIEFS OR EXPERIENCES OR PAINS....

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL THOSE WHO KEEP ARGUING WITH PEOPLE AND FEEL FRUSTRATED THAT NO ONE UNDERSTAND OR FEELS THEIR FAITHS AND BELIEFS OR EXPERIENCES OR PAINS...

Anything which is only a feeling or only FELT is felt differently by different people!!

There is nothing that your feeling is right or the feeling of the other person is wrong and vice versa!

So, unless we feel the same as the other person, we can't be in unison and always we will be at variance!!

Therefore, there is no point in arguing or trying to prove that you are right or he is wrong!!

There will be common understanding, acceptance only in proven things, which are time, people and place independent.

So, put in efforts to make the other person also feel what you have felt, if the other person is in a mental state of readiness to undergo the process and ready to devote, time, energy and other resources to walk your way to feel it, then that is the first and good sign of change to learn. If that person is not, then put in efforts to bring that person to this state of readiness to put in efforts to feel. Then you teach that person how to feel it.

There is no point in criticizing that person for not having felt what you have felt. If you are interested in proving you are right, if you want to make the person to change...learn...if you want that person gain the pleasure or happiness that you got, then you will have take interest, put in the efforts to make that person to feel it!!

Understanding...feeling...and experiencing are all different!!...Only when all these stages are passed through, we will get wisdom related to that faith or belief!!

All the best!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS OF ENGG AND BIO BRANCHES...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS OF ENGG AND BIO BRANCHES...

All of us have a Laptop which informs us in case of any malware entering the laptop which it has detected and actioned while we are listening to our favourite music and doing our professional work on the machine!

The laptop also warns us in case any virus enters the machine, while we are doing our jobs!!

We can find out almost the complete health status of the machine!!

We have researched and researched for many years and made this possible, to keep our laptop safe!!

We have only one life on earth!!...We have only one beautiful earth where we can live!!...This life is possible only if our body is alive!!...Only if it is disease, illnesses, disorders and ailments free!!...But many micro organisms can enter our body and kill us immediately or over a period of time. We get the symptoms only when most of the deadly terminal illnesses or diseases have already eaten away our body. After that the doctor says 'No Use...your hours or days are counted and you are sure to die!!'. This is the most shocking news that any one who is unlucky can hear in his life ever!!

We are all sooo brainy!!...We have discovered and invented sooo many ammmazing things for our entertainment and work. We are all the time thinking about soooo many things outside the body for the entertainment and comforts of the body and mind. We have crores and crores of engineers and biological scientists. Why not we look at our body also?...Why not we think, invent or discover methods of preventing the damage, detecting the damage, % age damage, health status of individual systems and organs, over all health status of our body and mind etc so that we can find out and take the remedial action well in time to ensure that we live pain free, disease free and live long on this earth!!

Peacefully yours...Rams!!

Extrovert and Ego are deadly combination!!...They can't live peacefully and can't not allow others also to live peacefully!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL THOSE 'CHATTER BOXES' 😀

Some of us are highly talkative!!...They can't remain quiet even for a second. They always want some one to hear them. Otherwise they go mad. Life becomes miserable for them. So, they are members of many social networking groups. They will keep blabbering. Some such people may not bother if the other person is listening or interested or sleeping. They will go on talking!!

But some are sensitive. Egoistic. They want every one to listen to them carefully. To remain focused on their talks. They will mostly talk about them. They might talk about the social issues too. They feel they are right and every one should agree to them. Some go one step above and expect and demand that they should also behave as per their likes. They will be active members in social networking sites and expect every one to agree to them and fight and argue with every one that they are only right and others are absolutely wrong. They will get angry, upset and keep jumping inside the house and at office disturbing the peace of every one. Even on road sides and shops they will pick up fights.

They can't keep quiet. They can't keep others quiet. They can't be peaceful. They will ensure that others around them are not peaceful!!

Obviously they will end up with all sorts of physical, mental and social health problems. They will be sidelined, will live lonely and die.

In olden days the girls who married such men sacrificed their entire life in hell on earth. Men who married such women are no different.

Today it is sure of a divorce or break-up, unless the other person is a Nobel Peace Prize or Tolerance awardee!!

Therefore...the crux is...

1. Never marry an extrovert who is egoistic.

2. If you are an extrovert ensure you remove your ego.

3. Retaining ego and trying to become introvert is not possible and no use!😂

4. So, ask yourself, Are you an extrovert?....Are you egoistic?

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

It is better to keep a distance from people with least or no expectations to keep them a source of learning and for ever in our life!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

When we define our life as 'A JOURNEY OF LEARNING' and look at others, keeping a distance, without any needs, wants and expectations, then we only learn from them. We mostly see only their positives. We don't see their negatives. Even if we see, we only learn not to have those within us. There is no hurt. We never lose them. They become a continuous source of positive energy and learning.

When we have ulterior motives, hidden agenda, vested interests and approach a person, then also we don't see their negatives, as our focus is on their 'wealth' or 'assets' that we have perceived and want to grab!!...Consciously or subconsciously our mind plans the strategies to gain close proximity and achieve the interests and leave them once the aim or goal or target is achieved.

When we get attracted towards others, when we don't define our life as 'A Journey of Learning', when we go inside their envelope with a list of needs, wants and expectations, then...

(i) we feel happy only some times when needs are met.

(ii) we mostly don't see the positives of that person and only observe negatives of that person. Positives go out of sight. Even positives are perceived as negative.

(iii) when we become possessive that is the starting point of misery for both and straining and breakage of that relationship.

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

Be childish...you will enjoy life and be successful too!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

Being kiddish and child like is Natural...It comes easily and naturally to us...it is the natural way of our existence...It is effortless...It is not stressful!!...It relieves all the pains and miseries...it cleanses us!!

If you are not able to, then you have full of EGO!!...It is controlling you, it is not allowing you to be kiddish and child like!!...So, you can't be Natural...You can't be peaceful, happy and healthy...People will only remain away from you or leave you...you can not have satisfying relationships!!...You can't love others and others can not love you!!...Love does not exist where ego lives!!

Ego does not allow us to learn...we feel full...no scope for further improvement life!!

One who has ego from childhood or adult hood will waste rest of 40 plus years of precious life without any learning, evolving, maturing, growing and remain immature for ever!!

When people don't acknowledge and behave commensurately with our ego we get angry, frustrated and devastated!!

Ego also brings all sorts of life style diseases and heart attack!!

Being kiddish and childish gives us immense satisfaction, contentment, fulfillment, great memories for future!!

Being adult or parent like is not natural...we have to put in efforts...we have to consciously do it...it is stressful...it strains and drains us...doing the tasks or activities of responsibilities with the mentality of a child with fun helps to enjoy the chores and mundane routine activities.

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

How to avoid the sadness and frustration we get after reading or hearing disturbing news in media?

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

We get up in the morning fresh, happy, peaceful, calm and cool!!

We read the news paper!!

We become angry!!

Feel frustrated that we are helpless and not able to do anything!!

Feel sad about our situation!!

No point in grumbling and getting agitated within ourselves and inside homes spoiling harmony and peace. We only land up on the lap of doctors eating handful of medicines!

Small fishes can't eat the Anacondas, Pythons and King Cobras and their followers and the culture they have created!!

So, it is better to read only the one liners of such disturbing issues...read in detail only those beneficial to our peace, happiness, good health and growth, eat only the small worms that we can eat and keep the pond clean!!...

We can't clean the oceans, unless we sacrifice a bit of comforts, peace, happiness, good health, family life, professional life and personal life...unless we jump in and drench ourselves...unless we toil and grow to the level of power, authority, become policy makers, either as bureaucrats or politicians or religious leaders or spiritual leaders or even super stars or tiny stars or police top brasses or hold constitutional appointments or reach policy making level in our profession, what ever it is!!

This requires a conviction, hard work, strong spine, nerves, muscles, guts, strategic decision making powers and an attitude of 'Ready to Sacrifice Anything!'

Also a life style and philosophical bent of spiritual mind to keep the health safe!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

How to attract every one towards us...how to keep our lovers with us??

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

Every one wants to be with infants and children!!

Every one is naturally attracted towards kids!!

All the worries and sadness dissolve, vanish and vapourise, moment we look at the happy faces of children!!

They are a bundle of joy and fun!!

They are good stress busters!!

Because they are pure!!

They are godly!!

They are heavenly!!

They are innocent!!

They are beautiful!!

They are not clever!!

They are not polluted with our Social theories and philosophies of strategic life and smart living!!

Not taught about being smart and crooked to live amidst the threats, exploiters and survival of the fittest theory!!

They are not burdened with social statuses like husband, brother, wife etc...they don't have to play any such roles and responsibilities!!

They don't have any demands, needs, wants and controls!!

We are not sexually attracted to kids, like we get attracted towards adults!!

We only experience a motherly love in us towards the children!!

We don't look for any resourcefulness from children...like we look for 'kaam kaa aadmi!!' with grown up adults!!

We only give everything to it and feel happy about with that love, caring, support and service we rendered!

We forget everything, we lose ourselves and we sort of surrender in those moments of being with them!!

We feel the same thing that we feel at the feet of the god!

We keep longing for being with that kid or want to have those moments again and again...but it is different from the urging and craving we have with adults with whom we have needs, wants and expectations and physical intimacies which create some changes, both inside and outside our body for moving further towards satiation of body needs!!

They are sources of unconditional love!

So, ...the crux is....

1. If we want to be happy and peaceful always, then we should feel young, child like, be innocent, be a source of radiation of peace and happiness always!!

2. Not to keep suspecting every one and always, but surely we can find out people with vested interests and hidden agenda, exploiters and cheaters, parasites and lazy bums!!

3. Responsibilities are only activities to be just done with fun.

4. If we want every one to come towards us, then we should be like children with all that mentioned above.

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

Some of the silent issues in our professions, personality traits and living which kill us silently and slowly...how to identify and tackle??

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

All of us face challenges from the first cell inside the womb till death. Nature has given us an advanced brain and skills to face the challenges or find out some space or method by which we can find peace amidst the battle.

But due to many reasons the brain is not healthy, not strong enough, does not have all the resources to face the challenge. So, we suffer.

Some of the professions like lawyer, doctor, police, politics etc have the elements of stressors and negative energy to deal with (negative people (like thieves, decoits, murderers, terrorists), duties and responsibilities that make us to work at places (mortuary, grave yard, drainage/sewage lines etc), with policies and procedures, with tools and equipment which are not health enhancing and with negativity!!)...So, our perceptions can lead to health compromises in these professions. They can cause loss of peace, happiness, good health, social well-being etc. Unfortunately we can't change to different professions, if we are interested, skilled and destined to choose these professions which involve negative energies!!

Some of our traits, though they will appear good and positive, but can result in spoiled peace, happiness, physical-mental and social well-being...e.g too much of intelligence associated with low Emotional Quotient and Spiritual Quotient, Type - A personalities who are generally goal and achievements oriented, Hyper Active people.

Psychologists pitch in at these places and guide people as to...

1. How to tackle the irritants in normal day to day living to find peace at home, organisations and social life.

2. How to tackle people? (significant people at home, peers-subordinates and bosses in organisations and rest others in society)

3. How to identify the health compromising issues in professions and personality traits, how to over come their negative effects and while we retain the positives and continue with those traits?

All of us have the ability to some extent to tackle the above issues, but psychologists are professionals who learn the theories and techniques, tools, therapies to deal with the issues professionally!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL YOUNGSTERS!!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL YOUNGSTERS...

The younger days are blessing that you have good health to do certain activities like adventures or visiting places where life is a challenge or difficult terrain or extremes of climate. It could be even scaling mount Everest or north pole or south pole or something different or in lesser scale than this!!

Anyway, going around and seeing the people how they live, various wonders of nature's creations, life and living makes us to evolve and mature!!...It also grinds the sharp corners and edges of our personality traits and results in valuable learning to make us good human beings which is the purpose and aim of life!!

What is important is WE SHOULD NOT GO AS TOURISTS TO ENJOY THE PLACE...BUT WE SHOULD VISIT PLACES AS TRAVELERS TO SEE, ENJOY, LIVE, FEEL, EXPERIENCE AND LEARN TOO!!

So, get up, pack up, go around, don't post pone it to later days...once you get married you are in a net...once you have children you are in a bigger and deeper net...lots of ifs and buts will not allow you to experience all these!!

Once you get older you might lose interest too!!...Adrenals will dry up!! (ha.haa.haaa!!)...But the flames and repressed desires, feelings, goals, aims, passion, dreams will haunt you throughout life and come out as weird thoughts, feelings, beliefs, faiths and behaviours which might not allow you to live in peace, happiness, harmony....you may not know the reasons for them...in many cases such suppressed issues of subconscious mind emanate and come up to conscious mind creating such issues in life!!

Life is once. Entire earth and world is ours. Even universe too. We are born to see, live, experience, feel and learn whatever possible. It is the purpose of life!!

So, don't curl up at your place of birth, growing and living. You will never grow, evolve and mature. You will live and die with all types of sensitivities which many people have (those who are born, brought up, live and die at the same place...they would have never gone out of the culture of their land...but will talk as if they know the entire world and they are right!!).

Going around places, living up the challenges, evolving and maturing is a must for a peaceful, happy, healthy and harmonious, adaptable living...and of course, to groom our children also in to great human beings and successful people fit for the future!!

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ENGG STUDENTS WHO WANT TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL TO HUMANITY!!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ENGG STUDENTS WHO WANT TO DO SOMETHING USEFUL TO HUMANITY!!!

Day by day the sound pollution is increasing!!

No way we can bring it down, inspite of rules and policies that 'no loud speakers after 10 pm' etc. Even otherwise the sound around us only increasing.

During festival times, the hundreds of loud hailers at religious places around us compete with each other in producing sound or music from early morning times.

Mind needs absolute silence or soothing music matching to our moods and interests at any time. Or soothing sounds of Nature.

All others are direct or indirect stressors to our mind!!

We can't do anything about these. But we have to protect ourselves from this sound pollution. Our body and mind are important to us!!

Some times this sound will not allow us to talk to or listen to others or watch our interesting TV programmes.

Ear defenders are not too perfect, cumbersome, produce head ache after some time as they press our temporal region and also do not solve our problem of selective listening.

So, can any one invent some method of 'absolute silence' in our ears and method of 'Selective Listening'??

God bless that inventor!!

Peacefully yours...rams..."!@#$%gist!!"

THIS IS FOR ALL...BUT SPECIALLY FOR YOUNG PEOPLE!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...BUT SPECIALLY FOR YOUNG PEOPLE!!

These days far tooooo many raw data or processed information are flowing in the hands and eyes of every one!!

In news papers, whatsapp, facebook, hundreds of tv channels!!

Every word or move of every one is discussed in detail by so many people!!...I agree that healthy outlets should be there for expression of thoughts, feelings and emotions in a democratic system.

Most of them are corrupted with perspectives of the reporters. So, we don't get the truth!!...At the end we are inside a big confusion only without any clarity!!

In most of the issues we can't do anything, other than hear gossips and talk gossips!!

Net result is, we only energize ourselves with negative energy, and release or store it, which affects our mind, health and social relationships.

Most importantly we are only wasting our previous life time, energy to screw up our physical, mental and social well-being!!

Therefore, it is better not to spend our time and energy on these issues, instead, can list down our goals or aims, how our life should be, what all we should achieve when in our life, how to improve our knowledge, skills, experience, wisdom etc...how to get good marks...how to move up in profession...etc.

All those people who spend more time on such issues stand wherever they are in life!!...Or go down!!...No improvement!!

Social responsibility?....Yes, we can spend some time in what ever we can do by DOING in which ever domain possible. Some examples are helping aged people at home and outside, spending some time with them to boost their morale, helping students, disadvantaged people (to be specific, orphans, people at 'old age home's, terminally ill people, people suffering from physical, mental and social pains), NSS, NCC etc.

Otherwise we should totally jump inside the murky waters of politics or whatever and dedicate our life to that to contribute whatever we can to society or country!!

So, the crux is...

DON'T WASTE YOUR PRECIOUS LIFE TIME IN DISCUSSING ALL THE ISSUES DISCUSSED IN MEDIA AND SOCIAL MEDIA. INSTEAD FOCUS ON YOURSELF AND CONTRIBUTE TO SOCIETY, COUNTRY AND HUMANITY IN A MEASURABLE AND QUANTIFIABLE (AT LEAST TO YOUR OWN SELF) MANNER THAT GIVES HAPPINESS, GOOD HEALTH, USEFULNESS, CONTENTMENT AND FULFILLMENT TO YOU AND OTHERS.

Dedicating our life time for evolving, growing and maturing in to a good responsible human being is not selfishness. It is the most important thing and vital thing every one should focus at. This is the biggest service to family, society, country and humanity!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL WHO WANT TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN THEIR LOVE LIFE WITH WIFE OR LOVER!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL WHO WANT TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN THEIR LOVE LIFE WITH WIFE OR LOVER!!

Belief and faiths become bedrock of our definition of life!!

What ever knowledge or wisdom or philosophy that is available on earth can be divided into two categories:-

(1) Proven by science
(2) Not proven by science

Those proven by science are indisputable (till they are disproved which generally takes decades by which time our life will get over!!). They are universally accepted by all, and same, irrespective of the person, place and time (past, present and future) as they are proven by all possible methods.

So, if two people join together who believe in or those whose definition of life or living is based on proven facts, then they will have common understanding, common back bone of life, there will be no disagreements, fights, arguments and resultant relationship failures, head aches, anger, frustration, sadness and related damages in life and living. They will always discuss issues where the issue takes the priority or merit and come to common consensus.

When our life is based on things not proven by science, then every one has different feelings, perceptions, beliefs, understanding and conviction. They are FELT things. Every one feels them differently and explains differently. No one can prove as they are not proven. They are only beliefs and faiths. So, one will not be able to convince the other or prove to the other. They will always land up in arguments and fights. "I am right/correct/true!" EGO only will be there in the front and the issue will take back seat. They will never be able to peacefully discuss. So, they will always have fights, disagreements, no or less satisfaction in relationships, even physical intimacies. This will go worse if a person is obsessed with his or her beliefs and faiths!!

If the other person also feels the same or accepts the faiths, beliefs and feelings of the other person, respects it, though there is a difference of opinion (i.e accepting the person as he is or as she is!...or agree to disagree...) and both of them come to a common understanding that both will follow their faiths and beliefs without the interference of one on the other, keep HUMANISM above their beliefs, give priority to their relationship more than their obsession on their beliefs, then they can live together peacefully. Otherwise it can result in catastrophic failure!!

But every one has faiths and beliefs which are mixture of both. i.e some are scientifically proven and some are not. In such cases the percentage of proven should be more than the unproven, between their beliefs. Then they can easily compromise or sacrifice for each other without much of losses and stresses/strain. Else compromising or sacrificing becomes stressful...less or more!!

Therefore, the crux is...

1. Adaptability should be groomed from childhood.
2. Rigidity, strictness on the name of Discipline should be avoided.
3. Flexibility should be groomed in us and children.
4. Humanism is superior and more important than all other 'isms' which have a Pandoras box full of faiths and beliefs. Our life and peaceful living with others at home, relative circles, organisations, society, city, state and country is more important than anything else under the sky!!
5. People and our relationships with others are more important than anything.
6. Difference of opinion and resultant stresses and strains in relationships will be less, adaptability is easy, compromises and sacrifices are cool, losses are less if people have more percentage of faiths and beliefs which are based on scientifically proven facts.
7. So, before falling in love or before marriage discuss these beliefs and faiths and check out.

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL MECHANICAL ENGG STUDENTS WHO WANT TO DO SOMETHING IN LIFE...

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL MECHANICAL ENGG STUDENTS WHO WANT TO DO SOMETHING IN LIFE...

The environment is increasingly getting polluted. Air is filled with too much of dust and toxic gases. It will only increase!!

This directly affects our lungs, health, performance and aging of various systems, stresses body and mind, brain performance and health of mind formed.

But we have our birth right to breathe pure oxygen and clean air.

So, why not some one find out methods of charging oxygen in a match box sized weightless container (which can be kept in side the shirt pocket) which can deliver right quantity of oxygen to nostrils at the right pressure. The containers should be chargeable at every petty shop, like the way we charge our mobiles. The cost of charging should be affordable for a daily wage earner and it should last for at least two to three days/per charge.

While the countries and governments scratch themselves to reduce air pollution, let us also come up with methods of saving our lungs, body, mind, living and life!!

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

How to find out which one is true love and which one fake love??

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL LOVERS AND SPOUSE...

One can arouse another person...or one can get aroused...for physical intimacies...based on physical appearance or personality traits...!!

You obviously know which one is happiness and which one is pleasure...!!

which one results in urges and cravings...and which one results in longing!

You know which one gives all negative thoughts, emotions and negative behaviors...and which one results in positive thoughts, emotions and behaviours!!

You also know which one is permanent/life long and which one is short lived!!

You also know which arousal is the caused due to fake love and which one is caused due to true love!!

You also know which one increases love and which one creates hate!!

Now you know which is one is predominant in your relationships and the reason for positives or negatives in your life and relationship!!

Now you know how to keep the love and relationship strong and at what levels...the percentage elements of both!!

Though we should always put in efforts to arouse or get aroused through both!!

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY WHO HAVE THE ITCHING TO DO SOMETHING GREAT IN LIFE!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...ESPECIALLY WHO HAVE THE ITCHING TO DO SOMETHING GREAT IN LIFE!!

Few decades before, every one lived in reality with nature around in villages and small towns!!...When the living with humans became stressful, they looked at the Nature around, which is a reality, to perceive peace and happiness!!

Whenever reality was stressful, whenever they did not get their dreams or wants or needs fulfilled, they switched their minds to fantasies too, which is all filled with imaginations and nothing in reality!!...So, more of living in reality and less of fantasies to fill the voids of life!!

Today we are connected to people far away in vision and audio so that the dear ones come near!!...But it still does not meet our reality needs and expectations so we get sad, frustrated and urges are only increasing more and more!...Therefore, we need to develop sensors or methods of sensing the other three senses too...1. smell...2. touch/temperature/humidity/pressure/feelings and intentions in touches...3. taste. And of course, methods of transmitting them to far away distances without any reduction in the sensed parameter!!...When all these are achieved then we will be at our best near to reality!!...Till such time, reality can not be replaced and Virtual Reality only attempts to move near to reality!!

So, the crux is...

1. Let us spend most of our emotional time with Nature and Reality, with people and things around.

2. Let us think about inventing the methods of sensing and transmitting the remaining three senses too!!

3. Let us spend only less with virtual stuff!!...Or spend more time with Nature and Reality, connecting them with fantasies and virtual reality, to fill the voids of emotional needs!!

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS OF MECHANICAL AND TEXTILE ENGINEERING

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL STUDENTS FROM MECHANICAL AND TEXTILE ENGINEERING...

The issue of global warming is well known. Lots of efforts being put in to tackle its effects.

Usage of air-conditioners at homes and organisations have been on the increase which is also contributing to global warming!!

Air-conditioners cool the entire hall or room or space. Truly we need to cool only our body or the equipment. Where as we are cooling all the equipment in the room and all the space. Truly our body skin area or the equipment we want to cool occupies only a minuscule part in the entire space. So, we are wasting lots of electrical energy!!

If only we can cool only our body through nano fans in the fabrics (the fabric should be affordable by even a common man!!) or through some other methods, then we can really really save lots of electrical energy on this earth!!

Can some one take up this research??

Peacefully yours...Rams!!

How to get physical intimacies and related stuff from others??

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

If one wants physical intimacies, first is to GIVE. Only then he or she will GET IT. Without giving first, one can not get it!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

"Sir, How can i get a good wife?"

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

Yesterday some man came and asked "Sir, How can i get a good wife?"

Me: "What is your definition of a good wife?"

"She should be like Seetha!!"

Me: "Are you a Rama?"

Be like a Rama. Live in forests and jungles and get a seetha who can live with you in such environs.

What he is talking about is personality traits. Both these characters are depicted on paper suitable for that kind of life and living described there.

Personality traits are formed out of and should be suitable for ultimately the definition of life and day to day living!!

Ultimately it is all about living with parents, children in the society of today amidst concrete jungles with all kinds of human-created beliefs, faiths and what not!!

So, if one is Ram, then a seetha is formed!!
If one is a seetha, a Ram is formed!!

Expectations are the key to unhappiness, sorrows, frustration and all negative thoughts, feelings and behaviours!!

Ultimately in the story neither of them lived peacefully in the perception of others and lived the life being lived by others!!

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

What should be our first and fundamental education and learning in life??

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

PEACE!!

The basic purpose and need of life!!

It is realised in mind through perceptions!!

It does not come from others or outside. It is not a reality. But realised by us through our own understanding, interpretations, and realizations through perceptions. Our beliefs, faiths, learning and education has to be such that they help us to realise this. If they don't help us to perceive peace, then they are not right, correct, true, useful and are a waste!!

First one needs to get the education required for perceiving peace!!...This is what we need to tell, educate, radiate to all others around and to our children!!

An educated and learned person is one who can perceive peace, allow and give others also to perceive peace!!...Otherwise he is not educated and all the education he or she has is a waste in reality!!

This is the necessary education for living and all other education and learning are only sufficient and superfluous to living!!

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

What is the Purpose of Marriage??

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

What is the purpose of marriage?

Is it for satiation of body needs (Food, air, water, clothes, shelter, physical intimacies and sex...and security of all these for life time!!)?...It is your body and you only need to find the ways of its satiation. How can you depend upon, demand, expect others for satiation of your needs??...How to get all these by yourself is the first education one needs to get!!...If you can not get them by yourself then no use of living as you can not live peacefully by expecting or demanding from others through words of fear, control, demands, quoting legal and social rules and regulations!!!...If you can not get yourself then why do you increase its needs?...Why do you make it to ask for and more and more?...It is your problem!!!!...It can't be dumped on others!!...If you say, i am ready to give this and that, then it is only a business of exchange of commodity or services for flesh and in a business losses and gains or collapses are possible and no business lives for ever and eternity, forever with peace, happiness and good health, which we have to accept, as it is the law of nature!!

First education and learning one needs to get is on this need and how to satiate these needs by ourselves!!

Is marriage for making wealth and money for life through others?

The question itself says who you are, what are your belief systems are and shows how parasitic or weak or crooked you are and therefore, there is no way of peace, happiness and health in your life!!

Is marriage for producing children through conventional and traditional methods, to be a reason of continuation of life on earth?....If so, then this RESPONSIBILITY comes with a tremendous big package of dedicating time, energy, emotions, and ultimate test and challenge for adaptations with another person of opposite sex. It is not a simple task that as you envisage or your parents feel or communities and societies feels in the present and future concept of life and living!!...For this one has to be self responsible, socially responsible, requires highest state of emotional and spiritual intelligence...first get them!!...Learn them!!...Else you are sure not to get peace, happiness, pleasures, health and success in life!!...IF YOU CAN NOT, THEN DON'T GET MARRIED AND WASTE YOUR LIFE, LIFE OF ANOTHER PERSON AND CHILDREN WHO HAVE NOT DONE ANY MISTAKE OTHER THAN BEING BORN OUT OF YOUR BODY AND SINS!!

Many who have all their thoughts, feelings and behaviours for society get married. Having thoughts and feelings for humanity and society are not wrong. But not having these for self and our significant people is not correct. Self responsibility takes priority over social responsibility!!!...so first take care of yourself and your parents, family first!!...Else don't be a part of and don't create social systems of marriage and family of traditional and conventional type!!...Be responsible in all dimensions!!!

What for then Marriage??

Certainly nor for the above. Then for what??

More later...

Peacefully yours...Rams...Psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL UNMARRIED AND MARRIED PEOPLE WHO WANT THEIR LOVE TO BE SUCCESSFUL

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL UNMARRIED AND MARRIED PEOPLE WHO WANT THEIR LOVE TO BE SUCCESSFUL!!

Love is not adoring the other person!
Love is not writing poems and kavithas!!
Love is not raising Taj Mahal after death!!
Love is not sculpturing the girl on a stone!!
Love is not offering poojas at temples for your beloved!!
Love is not buying gifts for your beloved!!
Love is not sending messages of love!!
Love is not talking about how you will look after your lover in future!!
Love is not clicking pics of your lover, framing it and doing pooja!!
Love is not earning money and giving to your lover!!
Love is not making wealth for your lover!!
Love is not saying "I can give my life to you!!"
Love is not taking knife and damaging the body!!
Love is not writing "I love you!" with your blood!!
Love is not showing all the stunts as seen in movies!!
Love is not showing caring and love affection to others in front of your lover!!
Love is not saying 'Happy birthday to you!" with costliest gifts!!
Love is not writing itihas of your beloved!!
Love is not about sex!!
Love is not hugging and kissing!!
Love has no negatives ever!! (no negative thoughts, feelings and behaviours)
Love has no hate ever...once loved is always loved!!...If you feel hate, then there was no love!!..There was only a business!!
Love has no wants, needs and expectations!!
Love is total surrender for the other person!!

Love is living with the beloved, giving full attention, time, energy, CARE for the peace, happiness, good physical-mental-social well-being of the beloved!!...Love is all about giving SUPPORT FOR complete and full freedom to think, talk, perceive, express, show, pursue their passions, thoughts, feelings and behaviours of their interest and mood, grow in knowledge, skills, aptitudes, hobbies....Love is being empathetic to understand the other person's likes and dislikes, wants and needs, expectations, the pain of their body and mind, ups and downs of the moods and interests of beloved...understanding, appreciating, accepting and helping!!...Love is being a father, mother, brother, son, daughter,
husband, wife, soul mate, bestest friend, sister and all other undefined relationships too!!...Love is helping in all the chores of the person and family!!

Love is not gender specific...so it is same for both in an emotional relationship!!...Both should reciprocate love to each other!!

So, love is caring, helping and supporting while being empathetic, unconditional and devotional!!

Perception of love and affection and feeling of acceptance from the significant people, organisations and social groups is basic of life and living!!

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL...SPECIALLY FOR THOSE ABOVE 60 YEARS!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...SPECIALLY FOR THOSE ABOVE 60 YEARS!!

There are several cognitive methods to fight out the fear of death!!

Rebirth philosophy is one!!

"The purpose and aim of this birth is to reach the god!"...this is another philosophy!

Like this there are several methods of accepting and inviting end of this life happily!!

there is another method...

Energy can neither be created not be destroyed. It only gets transformed from one form of energy to another form of energy.
All matter contain energy, whether living or non-living. So are we!...Therefore, we are a form of energy. We can neither be created nor be destroyed. We always remain within this whole system of universe in some form or the other. Present form is a conscious form wherein we have orientation of everything known to us. We may be in some other form later.

So, let us enjoyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy....

Peacefully yours...rams...psychologist!!

THIS IS FOR ALL ENGINEERING STUDENTS WHO WANT TO 'DO SOMETHING'...ESPECIALLY ECE STUDENTS!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL ENGINEERING STUDENTS WHO WANT TO 'DO SOMETHING'...ESPECIALLY ECE STUDENTS!!

Our forefathers and we have jointly and progressively spoiled and polluted the air (with all sorts of chemicals, dust etc), water bodies and earth. Screwed up the rains!!...When we suffer with diseases, spend lots of money to get these basics, when we think about what will happen to our future grandchildren, we get scared and are trying to get them back in shape!!

Same way there is a need to find out alternative methods of communication without using EM waves. We are ambitious to find out methods of instantaneous transmition and reception of several GBs of data, audio, pics and videos between objects separated by interstellar distances, use data analytics and what not to bring in reality infront of our eyes from far away distances, connect billions of people, connect their thoughts, feelings and activities instantaneously, make the mobile the best with all sorts of facilities. But we should see that the RF pollution does not affect our health.

The trend shows that it is going to only increase in the future which is scary. The effects of RF pollution are not immediate, but takes time. The symptoms appear when the damage is beyond repairs in many cases. It is a source of constant invisible stress.

So, it is better to wake up before it gets too late!!

Solutions can’t be found with the structured and limiting knowledge with boundaries that we have formed through our education system.

Creative, out-of-box and lateral thinking beyond the structural education we have got, is required.

Shall we do something about it??

Peacefully yours...Rams!!

THIS IS FOR ALL MEN WHO WANT TO LIVE IN THEIR HEART OF THEIR GIRLS ND HAVE A PEACEFUL, SUCCESSFUL, HAPPY FAMILY LIFE!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL MEN...

"kanavane kan kanda theivam"

(Husband is the God for a girl!!)

"Manaalaney mangaiyin Bhagyam"

(Husband is the World or Blessing or Luck for a girl!!)

"Purushan pulla varam kodukkura saami!!"

(Husband is the God who gives you the boon or gift of having a child!!)

"Mun thoongi pin yezhuvaal pathhini!!"

(a good wife or virgin or pathi vratha is one who sleeps after her husband sleeps and gets up before her husband gets up!!)

There are hundreds of such old sayings or Bible for indian or tamil girls written by "Men" of yesteryear, and many men still believe in this, and create such beliefs to be true in the minds of their sons and daughters too!!

Is there any saying or Bible for men as to how they should behave as good husbands or lovers or good friends or how they should treat a girl??

There is a bigggggggggggg list of expectations, needs, wants, demands and controls of girls as to how they should dress, how they should speak, how they should behave, how they should think, etc etc....a biggggggggggg universe of writings on these...with the basic concept that "she is born to SERVE men!!...She is born to give all the pleasures (feeling of goodness through urges and cravings that never comes to an end and which never gives permanent satisfaction!!...the one which creates demands, expectations, possessiveness and all such negative thoughts, emotions and behaviours that strain the relationship with a girl!!)...She is born to give birth to off-springs for the family...for the man...and rear them with the sensitization of the hard core belief systems of the father's family or culture or caste or religion"!!...Nothhhing more than this!!)...If she wants or aspires to do anything more, she is most welcome to do, but without compromising on the services to her God, Her Husband!! (not even children are considered here!!).

All these are primitive thoughts which have been framed by pervert, selfish, male chauvinist, bossy, egoistic, animal like men who only USED girls for their needs, wants and expectations.

They sadly did not consider all her mental faculties which are more powerful than that of men. They probably wanted to rule, keep her submissive, as a slave, to be used only for meeting their body needs, social needs, procreative and recreational needs!!...Therefore, they are always kept in a state of "Learned Helplessness" in the name of Love and affection, duties and responsibilities, giving an image or equivalence of God etc to make her feel better, happy, cool, calm in side the home only, to get washed away in the toilets and sinks!!

Therefore, the crux is...

1. All these are wrong
2. They can not give content and fulfillment to her life.
3. A girl kept this way can not be peaceful and happy.
4. It is grossly under utilization of the potential or resources of a human being.
5. Both men and women are differently and equally capable in all the personality traits, freedom to think-feel-express-behave-organise-lead etc.
6. A man who believes in all these can not keep his wife happy and peaceful. His love and married life will be a miserable failure only.
7. All these are not the verses of the Nature who has produced both men and women.
8. Nature has produced both to be capable of everything under the sky.
9. Both are independently dependent on each other.
10. One who respects her creation in the way Nature has created her, only will live in her heart, all others will only keep her body inside the four walls and enjoy it!!...One can decide what is important "whether to live in her heart or keep the body alive inside four walls for pleasures!!"
11. All these primitive beliefs and definitions have been made when Division of Labour was laid down by MEN during the initial days of formation of civilization and social systems which are redundant and no more relevant in an industrial society of oppurtunities and equivalence. So, don't be primitive and screw up your family, love and emotional life, which is important for a peaceful living.

12. Love means not demanding, wanting, needing, only looking at selfish needs by quoting all the old sayings or verses or Bibles of Life and Living made by irresponsible, selfish, dictator men who said 'what she should need' without thinking 'what she actually needs!'...'whom she should be' and not 'who she is'.
LOVE IS CARING AND SUPPORTING UNCONDITIONALLY AND DEVOTIONALLY!!....Any one who lives as per this definition will have a happy married and peaceful life, will get everything that he wants from his wife, will live in the heart of his wife, all others will suffer and die without getting anything from her!!

Peacefully yours...rams...Psychologist!!

Simple things in life, but make a lots of difference in our living!!

Dear all...THIS IS FOR ALL...

There are many commonly used words which we don't understand the meaning clearly and completely.

LIFE STYLE is such a word. It means many things to many. Some are common. Some are not common.

Many people cover their entire body, especially head, and sleep whole night. They get up in the morning and feel depressed and remain down the whole day. This makes them not to perform well in school or college or office or at home. They pick up fights and spoil their day and may be life too!!

If you breath carbon-dioxide for 7 to 8 hours, how can your brain remain healthy and produce a healthy, positive and confident mind for the next day??

Simple things in life, but make a lots of difference in our living!!

Mind is the reason for most of the problems, and it is produced by brain, and brain needs mainly lots of oxygen...clean air...to produce a healthy, happy, cool, calm, peaceful and confident mind!!

Peacefully yours....rams....Psychologist!!