What is love?...another dimension....

• Hai all...
  
  every teen ager falls in love...every adult falls in love...love can be defined in infinite number of ways...if we ask for definition to 1 crore people we will get 100 croroe answers...the definition of an individual changes depending upon the age, needs and stage of our life...
  
  Is there any one who loves a person (for marriage or living together) without the arousal value?...will you get married to a person who does not arouse you? (many girls get forced in our community to marry boys who do not arouse them....if they say 'i don't like him!' parents ask 'why?' can any girl in our community answer to her parents 'He does not arouse me!'?...Do girls get aroused for living with a boy in a moment or few seconds of seeing or interacting for few minutes or hours or days?....the ('f' all) concept here is they will get adjusted later and get aroused!!!....
  
  

  'love at first sight!' 'the bell rang in my heart moment i looked at him/her first time!' etc are purely based on physical appearance and 'perceived personality attributes' (i.e 'he/she will be like this')...it might or might not evolve into a life long soul-mate relationship...but the love that blooms after many years of friendship without any physical need or any sort of dependence is the one that will turn into a soul filling life long relationship!!! (But the back bone of our culture is 'make the girl a parasite and locked in all directions' so that the marriage becomes 'successful' (?)!!) (in local language 'kazhutha veettaiye suthheettu kedakkum!)...great culture we have made for our children!!!
  

  rams

   

  some comments and my remarks are below...

   

  Are you a sociologist or psychologist ? Don't look at worldly problems.it will ruin our life.Nalla vishayangala mattum parunga !From time immemorial ,these problems have existed.Don't single out any problem. 

   

  Worldly life is 700 crore(world population)plays directed by God.Script is not the same.Some scripts have only comedy,only tragedy,mix of both,masalla and so on !

   
• Manickarajan Ramasubramanian hai boss...i have read both sociology and psychology...we are part of many social systems by default which influence our living and we influence them...my posts are based on the issues come in front of me through people who come for guidance (counseling?)...their cries, fears, 'standing on the brink of life' feelings, 'you are the last source of my confidence!' approaches make me to type all these...i am looking at my/our community problems...the problems faced by my contacts here...i have insulated myself since childhood from all the dirts of our culture...so, i am happy, healthy and peaceful...still walking in life towards my definition of success...when people call me to talk i talk...when people come to me for suggestions, help, guidance or counseling i do...i type the same thing here...many have told me, both young and old, that they have helped them to change for positives...also this is my wall...so i have the liberty to say what i think is right...yeppoodeee?...(smiling!)....by the way, you have the liberty to type anything on my wall...only when people are allowed to expose, they expand...this is my philosophy...so no probs brother!!!...keep typing and keep talking...

   

  one more comment...

   

   

   Interesting Subbu, keep penning, you raise very important social issues, we cannot be Osterich to run away and hide, we have to face the issues as it comes, sometimes too many things are combined and much complex than we can simply analyse. But simplicity is answer to complexcity as well .


• Manickarajan Ramasubramanian thank you so much sir for the encouragement...words from seniors and my bosses like you makes me going with reading, researching, helping others and moving towards the eternity of knowledge and wisdom with respect to human and social behaviours, management, science and engineering. Thank you sir (salutes!).

   

   

  "Initial stage Passionate love matures or transitions into companionate love, only when friendship and understanding exists between partners! Need to invest a lot in the relationship to make this happen. Sometimes this transition does not happen properly and partners lose interest in each other."

   
 "yes, we have to invest a lot in jewelry, property in wife's name,silk sarees etc"
 
Manickarajan Ramasubramanian i think investing more time to adore them, listen to them, adore their traits, make them grow by strengthening their positive talents, seeding some new talents in them by which they realise their potentials, making them self actualise, helping them to rise to different dimensions, attain fame, breath the freedom, make them feel flying are the important investments to be done to strengthen or mature the relationship...these provide them the life long peace and happiness...other material gifts etc might add only the cream...not the main pudding!!
 
 
"well said Rams! Every Person is Only looking to self actualize. Partnership is about self actualizing."



Manickarajan Ramasubramanian hmmmmmmmmm....i am only getting a big perumoochhu!...anger against all the so called 'munnorgal'....who created the division of labour at home....they only perceived the girls as servants who will do all the donkey's jobs, emotional labour and sex workers...nothhhhhhhhhhhhing more than that!!...if some one wants his wife to do domestic jobs he should get married to a domestic servant or employ a servant or stay in a flat or hotel where house keeping does all these jobs...wife is not a servant...she is a friend...she is a companion...she is there to share intellect...arts...knowledge...wisdom...play...sing...dance...enjoy spirituality...this wrong concept of role of wife only has screwed up the wife-husband relationship in the past few decades...the present generation is growing in the correct way....i only wish the old primitive organisms of our era and previous era do not spoil them and screw up their lives too!!
 
 
rams